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Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by sheer honesty, or you think me having my own opinions is "being negative", then this is not the place for you, and I suggest you leave and head elsewhere. I call a spade a spade, and I don't sugarcoat anything.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Lesson Learned: Ignore the Damn Press!!!!

Since this is Michael's month I thought I would not post anything this month that is not related to, or about Michael. I thought this was a very interesting article.

Michael's Hauntingly Prophetic Words Before He Died

This was an article done just a few days before he passed away. I read it and believe me, I feel his pain!! The same shit has happened to me many times. Just like Michael, people have made me out to be the bad guy too. Sometimes it may be well deserved. I mean really! I have been known to be an asshole now and then. LOL! But at the same time, I can be very sweet. I can be the best friend someone ever had. If I really like someone, I am very loyal to them, I love to laugh and have fun. I like to make people laugh, whether they are laughing at me or with me, I don't care. I just like making people laugh and feel good. I also like to think I will always be there for my friends, through thick and thin. But also I couldn't care less if someone doesn't like me or gets angry at me. No skin off my nose!!

One example of something that Michael said in this interview that really got me was this:

"It would be so easy for me to say that I hate what I've become, but then, what I've become, certainly in the public eye, I've had no control over.
"I don't like that.
"It concerns me a great deal that every move that I make is looked at, photographed, and made into gossip, some f---ing sound bite that doesn't resemble the truth."

I know exactly how he feels! I remember when the delusional fans forum went up, they were in their stupid-ass forum saying shit about me too. Catsredrum even designated one of her dumbass friends my "official stalker". That was the one called Mayday06. I remember that came even after months of me not even mentioning them on my blogs or anywhere else. Yet they were still hounding me on their forum, which conveniently for them was closed to the public. But still, I knew some of the people who were members of that forum. I saw their names on the member's list. So, sometimes I wondered if those people were reading what these dipshits were saying about me, and actually believed them. Most of what they were saying in there about me was just their own speculation. But you know how gullible people are!! Catsredrum and her friends took my words and twisted everything I said around to mean something they pulled out of their own asses. People who actually know me in person, and have known me for a long time, would know I would never do any of the things the delusional fans forum was accusing me of doing. But someone on the internet, who doesn't know me as well, would read that stuff and actually believe it's true just because someone said it. So I know exactly how Michael felt.

But then there is this other side of me that says "what you can't control, use it to your advantage." After the people in the delusional fans forum got their stalker situated on me, one of them made the stupid mistake of saying that I killed my dog, Groucho, just so I could attend a concert. She died just before I was due to attend a concert and meet and greet with INXS in Portland. What they didn't know was that the tickets for that concert and meet and greet was bought before Groucho even got sick. It was a birthday gift to me from my sisters. But I do admit that I was concerned about going to that concert because I thought Groucho, who was pregnant at the time, might have needed someone to watch her. But I would never have killed her to go to that concert. In fact, if I thought for one second that it would bring her back, I would have given up going to that concert completely. Well, once I found out one of them accused me of killing my dog, I said "this has got to stop!" You can say whatever you want about me, I don't care. But you cannot accuse me of putting a concert over my animals!! That's a no-no!! I don't tolerate that!! Some lies are just not forgivable!! So what did I do? I got some professional stalkers of my own and told them to go into the delusional fans forum and bring me back some good things I can hound them with. They did, and so I had my own fun, putting their shit right back in their faces!! I don't have to tell you all that it did not take long for them to find some stupid shit they said about me in there! LOL!

If only Michael knew how to do that himself. He could have had some fun with the press. Screw not hurting their feelings! Do what you gotta do! They said Michael was one of the most hated people in the UK. That's bullshit!! Lots of people still love Michael. But do you think the person who said that cared if he hurt Michael's feelings or not?? I don't think so!! Michael should have turned that around to his advantage. It can be done. Even people constantly taking his picture. Someone even did that to me at a gas station once. And I looked terrible!! I had been standing on my feet for hours then. I was tired and my hair was all messed up. But I even made a joke about that. I said "If I had known she was going to take my picture, I'd have fixed my hair up and smiled!" I dunno, maybe that girl was looking for candid shots. LOL!! I should have been angry, but I wasn't. Making jokes about things like that helps a lot. It did me, anyways.

Well, before I learned to laugh at myself, I did get upset a lot with people who would say shit about me on the internet. I do get depressed still sometimes, but I work hard at it not to let it all get me down. But it is very hard being myself. Sometimes I wonder how I've handled it all these years, just being the complex person I am. But I know I cannot change, and I don't really want to change. Some things I admit needs work, and I am working on them. But for the most part, this is as good as I am ever going to get. Take it or leave it!! And it's just as fine with me if you leave it!

Michael was also very insecure about his singing, which I don't understand at all. He also said he has no real friends, which I also don't know why he said that!! He has more friends than I do! And if he was as shy as everyone said he was, I find hard to believe. I guess he was just a likable guy!! I liked him. And I am VERY shy!! Not only am I shy, I am also very reclusive. I'm very reserved around other people. I don't go out and chit chat with people, I don't even smile at anyone when I am walking around. Unless they smile at me first. That's just how I am. I used to smile and talk to everyone. But then too many people have given me evil looks back when I smiled at them. So, I just don't do it anymore. When I saw Timmy walking around outside the Paramount Theater that one time I had a picture taken with him, it was a LOT for me to even ask him if he would allow me to have a pic taken with him. I love Timmy! But like I said, I am very reserved around people. I've been hurt by people WAY too many times. I remember at that meet and greet with INXS in Portland, I smiled and said hello to Kirk, and he just totally snubbed me. That hurt me really bad! Because I used to love Kirk!! He wouldn't even look at me, let alone say hello. I didn't understand it, and won't try to. But it's incidents like that, where I really liked someone, and it turned out they just don't like me, that has made me so reclusive. Now, I just don't care about that anymore.

I know Kirk is just a public figure, and he didn't know me. So he couldn't know if he liked me personally or not. But if I am standing there in front of them, smiling at someone and I say hello to them, that's rare for me! I'd have to really, REALLY love someone, and feel comfortable around them, in order to do that. And I really, REALLY loved Kirk! When he snubbed me like he did, it really, REALLY hurt bad! Actually I have yet to hear of any fans who are as large as I am that said they had a good experience with Kirk. So, all I could deduce is that he just doesn't like oversized fans. Doesn't make me feel any better about him as a person, but it may shed some light on what his problem was with me. I just don't like him anymore. And I will never again try to be nice to someone like that. I can forgive him though, and I am trying to work on that as we speak. But I will never forget it. I'll just know, next time I see him, not to even try to be nice to him. And just for the delusional mods, I am not going to hurt him!! I'll just ignore him. That's one thing the delusional mods always said about me is that I am crazy enough to shoot someone through the head. Like what happened to John Lennon. But no. I may be crazy, but I would never do that to anyone!

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