Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by sheer honesty, or you think me having my own opinions is "being negative", then this is not the place for you, and I suggest you leave and head elsewhere. I call a spade a spade, and I don't sugarcoat anything.

Wednesday, October 17, 2018

The Ugly Truths of Life

I saw a topic like this on Quora, and I thought it'd make an interesting blog post for today. I saw some very interesting things that other people listed, and I've always known to be so true! Most people today want to cover up their own little ugly truths. But they are all there, even though most people try to deny them. I claim no rights to these, they belong to their respective authors. I'm just listing the ones I read that I can relate to. These are my favorites. But some ugly truths that I personally have known to be true are as follows...

1. Looks really do matter.
I've heard people say looks are not everything. But let's face it, looks really do matter. People always judge you by how you look. That's what makes them either want to get to know you, or to stay away from you.

In contrast I say this...

2. Sometimes the ugliest people have the biggest heart.
Though most people are judged by others on how they look, don't turn away from the person who is ugly. Sometimes they are the kindest people you will ever know.

3. No one really cares about anyone.
No matter how nice a person may seem, the ugly truth is no one really cares about you. Most people have problems of their own to work out.

4. Real friends are almost impossible to obtain.
People meet each other all the time, and they may seem nice. But unless you know them really well, they are not your friends. I learned this long ago! Not everybody is interested in becoming your best friend. No matter how nice you are to them.

Shoot! That's why I am not trying to make friends now that I am back on Facebook. I don't want fake friends anymore.

5. We're all going to die. No matter how healthy we are. And we don't know exactly when.
The truth is we are all going to die one day. I'm grateful I'm over 40 now and I'm on my way to 50. But I have no idea if I really will reach 50. I may be out walking Mya and get hit by a truck. Life is indeed fragile!

6. Poor people are always ignored.
It's true. Even good people reject poor people. It's just a fact of life.

7. People hate honesty. Especially if it's about them.
This is one of my biggest things about life. I always try to be honest. Even if it means I have to hurt someone's feelings to do so. But sometimes I feel the truth just needs to be said. Like Ben Shapiro always says, facts don't care about your feelings. Nobody likes the truth, when the lie is more comforting.

8. All over the world, very young girls are being forced into marriage to older men, children are being whisked away from their families, people are dying of cancer or other diseases, mothers are having their child die in her arms and she can't do anything about it. Yet, a lot of people still get inhumanly angry because someone won't use their preferred pronouns!
This is probably one of my biggest pet peeves about this world! And it really chaffs my ass! We have so many big problems in this world that needs to be fixed. We have homeless veterans, little girls who have their vagina literally mutilated so they can accommodate a man-sized penis, people starving and dying, mothers caressing their dying child that cannot be saved. And yet, people in this country, who want to identify as a different gender, are griping like hell because others refuse to use their proper pronouns. Personally, I think it's more important to feed a starving person than to consider identity politics.

9. Everyone takes a dump once in a while.
No matter how tough or intimidating someone thinks they are, eventually they'll have to let one go. Remember that next time you meet someone intimidating!

10. Life is simply not fair.
So, suck it up and move on. Took me a while to learn this.

11. You aren’t doing it because you want to, you’re doing it because other people are. 
You’re being a fake person. Right now. You don’t want to “succeed” because you do, but because other people have told you you should. You chuckle and whoop the exact same way as everyone else in your culture does. You are a good little society person. A good little sheep. Baa!

12.  Every one of us will eventually be forgotten and leave no trace.
This may be an ugly truth to some, but for others, it may be a relief. The Universe is right now reducing itself toward a state of thermal equilibrium, or maximal entropy. In that state, all the information about every human that has ever lived will be dispersed to the point of unrecoverability. That includes the most famous stars now to the poorest beggar. With an upper limit, then, it’s only a matter of likely much less time before we are all someday forgotten to the World.

13. Some people take special interest to know your personal stuff to use it to their own advantage by manipulating you through your weaknesses. Be smart in dealing with them.
I have learned this over the past years. So, I pretty much keep my biggest secrets to myself. Yes, there are things I haven't even written about on this blog that have happened to me. I only write about the things I've experienced that were not really so bad on here. The really bad stuff, I keep to myself.

14. At times, even your parents, siblings, spouse, children become selfish and only look after their own gain. If you have generous people around, you are really blessed.
I have one. I call her "sis". She is the kindest, most generous person I know.

15. Being a good person means you suffer. 
That creativity is undervalued makes sense. Some creativity is detrimental, and it's hard for most people to assess good ideas at the time. What's truly disturbing (and mostly unrelated, because creative people are not always good and vice versa) is that, the better a person is, the more unlikely it is for that person to have material success. Work ethic and talent and drive all make it easier for someone to make it to the top, but the impact of moral pliability (or, more frankly, amorality) is 10 times as strong. Good people are taken advantage of, constantly, and generally too restrained to do what it takes to acquire power.

16. People, abstractly, like the idea of "creativity". They don't like creative people. 
This is especially true of aggregates. Because most people are morally weak and herd-like in choosing who to support and promote, and who to reject, we have a system that favors reliable mediocrity over creation and general advancement. We'd probably have 15% annual GDP growth, worldwide, instead of 4%, if the most creative people were valued instead of made into pariahs. As a species, we're capable of producing people with the talent to solve our biggest problems, but incapable of promoting them to positions where they can use it.

17. Most people are morally weak and will fail you for any reason, or no reason.
I'm not talking about buckling under extreme pressure. Most people, if you fall into bad times or drop in social status, will ditch you when you need them the most, even if what you need (someone to stand up and defend you, or an introduction to someone who can help you) costs them nothing. And by "most people", I mean 90%. Calamities like the Holocaust can't be blamed entirely on the truly evil 5% of humanity. The inaction of the middling 90% is, in my opinion, much more to blame.

18. People will talk behind your back. Make sure to give them an interesting topic.
That's the reason I keep blogs in the first place. Might as well give them something to talk about if they want to talk about me. LOL!

19. One of the cruelest things you can do to a person is to pretend you care for them more than you really do.
This is why I genuinely care about my friends. Sometimes I think I cared too much! Caring too much though I've found can get you in trouble. That's why now I am cutting back on that.

20. People won't always tell you how they feel, but they will always show you.
Pay close attention to how people respond to you.

21. If someone is stupid enough to walk away from you, be smart enough to let them go.
I hadn't learned this until quite recently.

22. The cost of not following your heart is spending the rest of your life wishing you had.
I should have married Michael. He might still be alive if I had!

23. It takes time to make someone respect/like you. But reverting it is extremely easy.
That's why I am not here to make friends. I'm here to give my opinion on subjects. If I were trying to make friends, believe me, I'd keep my mouth (or keyboard) shut more often.

24. Do not be proud if everyone wants you, cheap items have many buyers.

25. All religions are man-made.
This is why I have no religion. And I prefer to stay that way. I believe in GOD and I worship HIM in my own way.

26. There is no such thing as "equality".
This kinda goes under the "life is not fair" category. People today all want equality. But no such thing exists in nature. It's something people in civilization have to fight for. But I believe some are fighting for this reason just so they can take away the rights of others.

27. You cannot please everyone. 
So don’t try to. It will make you miserable. I learned this when I was in 6th grade.

28. Most arguments are pointless.
Will it matter in 5 days, 5 months, 5 years? Probably not.

29. Reading a good book is one of the best investments you can make.
If someone thought it was important enough to write down, it’s important enough to read.

30. Your intention is what matters the most.
A well-thought out gift is worth more than any amount of money.

31. Every cliche contains a profound truth.
We have heard them numerous times, but the wisdom is always there.

32. Perfection is impossible in an imperfect world. 
Chase progress instead.

33. Some people are simply the wrong match for you.
This makes me think of the INXS fans I tried to make friends with on Facebook: If someone makes you feel uncomfortable and insecure every time you’re with them, for whatever reason, they’re probably not close friend material. If they make you feel like you can’t be yourself, or if they make you “less than” in any way, don’t pursue a connection with them. If you feel emotionally drained after hanging out with them or get a small hit of anxiety when you are reminded of them, listen to your intuition. I always felt like I couldn't be myself with most of them, and it turned out I was right. I have most of them blocked now on Facebook, and it makes me feel free! Even though I am not completely myself anymore.

34. We all have the same problems.
My problems are the same as your problems. You might be dealing with some big shit, but you’re not alone. That broken relationship, that person who just got dumped, person that passed away, rejection letter you got or redundancy you were forced to take is happening to many other people, at exactly the same time.
Knowing your problems are all the same is how you stop yourself from getting stuck and feeling sorry for yourself. All your problems are simply a process that you have to deal with.
This process is part of the human experience and it’s what you were forced to sign up for when your parents decided to have sex and create you in the first place. Life is a struggle and it will always be one.

35.  Complaining is a Fucking waste of time.
It achieves nothing and is for cry babies who don’t want to face the harsh truth: we’re in control of everything that happens to us. Meaning: we’re in control of how we interpret all events.
Complaining is a disease that carries an antidote called “Freaking stop it, now, please.”
No one likes a complainer and it’s only making you get stuck in your head instead of charging forward towards your goals and doing something which is cool.

36. Uncertainty is a natural instinct of life.
No matter, how hard you try to plan your life. But it always takes an unexpected turn which you have never ever dreamt about. And the ugliest reality is that you need to walk on that turn despite having unwillingness about it.

37. Realistic Goals Are Harder To Achieve Than Seemingly Impossible Ones
“Ninety-nine percent of people in the world are convinced they are incapable of achieving great things, so they aim for the mediocre. The level of competition is thus fiercest for ‘realistic’ goals, paradoxically making them the most time and energy-consuming” — Tim Ferriss (not my Timmy).

38.  We Focus More On Others Than Ourselves
I admit this has always been my problem. Much of what we do stems from our need to be liked and accepted by others. It’s hard-wired into our brains. Disapproval from our social group had serious repercussions in the past. Survival was difficult. Death was a likely consequence if you didn’t have others to support you out in the wilderness. That’s the reason we do our best to look good in front of others. Having a high status ensured that you had the first choice of meat and mate. It’s why most of us still go out of our way to impress others. But the pursuit of status is killing us. Because the overt pursuit of status is a low-status activity, we signal our worth and value to others by acquiring possessions. Those who spend money they don’t have to buy things they don’t need aren’t entirely illogical; they are just misguided. Rather than change what everyone thinks about us, we would be better served if we worked more on ourselves. Create value, and the world will notice you, slowly but surely.

39. Negative Thinking Leads To Positive Results
“Nothing happens to the wise man against his expectation” — Seneca
Much has been said about the power of positive thinking in recent times. We are taught that optimism and affirmations are the key to leading a happier life. Except that doesn’t always hold up.
The ancient Stoics thought that this practice invited passivity into our lives. Such thinking encourages us to simply hope for things to get better instead of taking concrete action. And so, they went the other way.
They regularly conducted an exercise known as premeditatio malorum, which translates to a premeditation of evils. The goal was to imagine the worst events that could possibly happen to them and then figure out the best way to prevent such an occurrence.
That’s the power of negativity. We are primed to avoid pain and discomfort. It makes sense that we take advantage of this inclination to give us motivation to act. Rather than deny the harsh realities of life, we should acknowledge them and take the driver’s seat.

40. Good deeds are often forgotten.
People will forget the good you did to them, once they no longer need your help or support. But you are defined by how you behave with them not otherwise, so hold on to your character.

41. Money matters a lot.
I know lots of people say that money does not matter but most of those people are the ones who have money. But money does matter, it changes how you live, it changes how you complete your responsibilities, it helps you ward of some issues from your life and makes you happy.

42. Some people hate the fact you’re the real you, instead of following the same habits other people are using.
I think this was my problem with the SJWs.

43. No matter how sweet and kind you are, there will always be people who will still say "this tea doesn’t have enough sugar."

44. Girls do like bad boys, same as boys do like sluts.
This is a very sad truth, because girls who marry the "bad boys" often wind up in a coffin before their time.

45. Stereotypes are there for a reason.
Though people like to pretend they don't, we all stereotype others. Most women will feel a bit uncomfortable when a big black man walks toward them. I don't like islamic muslims because they have a history of killing innocent people. There are people who still cringe when they see a transsexual person. Fat people will always be seen as lazy, stupid people who overeat the wrong foods. Stereotypes are there, and there's nothing anyone can do about them.

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