Disclaimer:

Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by sheer honesty, or you think me having my own opinions is "being negative", then this is not the place for you, and I suggest you leave and head elsewhere. I call a spade a spade, and I don't sugarcoat anything.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Over The Edge

I never wanted to tell this story, because there are some things that I would rather forget about. But recently in remembering about my former roommate Patti, I remembered someone who literally made me want to reach through the phone and strangle her to death! I am usually not a violent person, and I never lash out at anyone, even if they lash out at me. There are a lot of things I can tolerate, and I have quite a bit of endurance when it comes to that too. I’ve been called every name in the book, and beyond, and still came up smiling and laughing. It’s really hard to make me feel bad by calling me names. Sometimes the person calling me names will make me more cautious. But never do I allow such a childish act to make me feel bad about myself. But to push me over the edge is very difficult. Patti almost achieved that, but almost does not count. And I remember that Patti is an old woman who was having withdrawal symptoms from not being able to guzzle her usual cheap booze, and shoot up her usual street drugs while I was there, for fear perhaps that I would divulge these acts to her workplace and get her fired from her one and only job.


But there was one woman I contacted that actually did push me over the edge, and she didn’t even have to do much to do it. I was a naïve youngster in my mid-20s. The year was 1998, and I wanted to get a playmate for Monkey, my Australian shepherd. I looked at several breeds. Huskies were one of them, and I also thought about a Rottweiler, but my dad frowned on me getting a Rottweiler. I found husky pups, but then I read that huskies are fence-jumpers that like to wander, so the idea of getting one of those is out! In that same paper, in the same classified section, I saw an ad for german shepherd puppies, and it said they would accept terms and even deliver the pup to me. I thought that ad was sent from Heaven. My car was on the fix, and I could not run it. So there was no way I was able to go there myself and pick up that pup. I had called several ads for dogs that day, and I found out in a flash that not many people are really willing to sell to someone who does not have a car! They kept asking me “How will you take the dog to the vet?” After hearing that so many times, it was a total relief that there was one person whose ad stated she is willing to deliver the puppy. So I called the ad.


The woman I spoke to was named Diana, and she told me she has one female left, that has a little hernia on her belly. It didn’t bother me because I had a pup once with that same kind of hernia. So I said I would be interested in the puppy and asked her if she could really deliver it to my residence. I  explained the situation why I could not drive to her place, but I wanted to make sure I was not just seeing things where her ad said she would deliver. I gave her my address and some driving directions, and Diana said “Sure, I can deliver!” I was so grateful. We both made an appointment for the very next day for 11:30 AM and I told her I was looking forward to seeing the baby. So I got myself prepared for the next day.


I got up, all on pins and needles, not being able to contain myself. I simply could not wait to see the pup. I was filled with excitement and anxiety. I went through my morning routine, which consisted of me putting the dishes up, feeding Monkey, fixing breakfast for me and my sis, and then watching our morning programs, like Gimme A Break! By the time Gimme A Break was over, it was 10:30AM, so I had an hour to wait till my puppy arrived. I decided to fill the time by cleaning the house a bit, and my sis helped me. It was around 11AM when I stopped because now the house was looking spotless. In my mind, I was secretly hoping that Diana would show up a bit early, so I could see the puppy that was soon to be mine. But 11AM came and went, and I hadn’t heard or seen anything. Every time a car passed by, my heart would pound faster, and I would look carefully out the window to see if Diana and the puppy had arrived. Then 11:30 AM rolled around, and I said “She’s got to show up now.” But she didn’t. 11:30AM came and went, no sign of Diana.


I didn’t know what to think, I figured maybe she was just caught in traffic. So I waited around. Noon came, and still no sign of Diana. She hasn’t even called at this point, so I decided to try and call her. I called and got a ring tone, but got no answer. I figured she was just on her way over and she would show up in our driveway momentarily. Then 12:30PM came and went and still no sign of Diana, not even a call. I tried calling her again, and still got no answer. I was beginning to believe deep down inside that she is never going to show up. Then 1PM came around, and I still hadn’t heard from Diana. I got a bit tired of waiting, so I got up and caught the local bus to the local pet store. I don’t know why I made that move; I just wanted to see some puppies I guess. The pet store was not far away. I was back home by 2PM, not having seen any pups at the pet store that sparked my interest. When I got home, my sis told me that Diana called shortly after I left. Dammit! That always happens, without fail!! My sis told me that Diana was held up that morning and wanted to reschedule the appointment for the next day, and wanted me to call back.


Now, I’m sure my sis did not expect what happened next to happen at all, otherwise maybe she would have taken some initiative to reschedule the appointment herself while she had Diana on the phone. Even I never expected what happened then to happen at all. I quickly got on the phone and dialed Diana’s number. This time I got no ring tone, just a busy signal. I tried again 5 minutes later, the line was still busy. So, I tried again 5 minutes later and the line was still busy! I figured maybe Diana was on the phone to a friend or something, so I decided to wait about 20 minutes or so to call her back. I waited that 20 minutes, thinking that if she’d been on the phone since she called my sis around 1PM that afternoon, then that’s plenty of time to speak to a friend on the phone! So, I called her number again, and once more, the line was still busy!! I waited another 10 minutes before I dialed her number again, and it was still busy!!


This went on for about 6 hours. It started out, I would dial Diana’s number every 10-20 minutes, then it got to be every 25-30 minutes, and still each time, the line was always busy! I began to wonder if Diana was doing this on purpose. At one point during the day, I even wondered if I had been dialing the right number. I try to give everyone a chance, and I did not want to think the worst, not even at this point. So I kept dialing. Finally at around 7:30PM I got a ring tone on her line. Some teenager picked up the phone and said hello. I said hello to him and “I’d like to speak to Diana please.” And he very rudely stated “Well you’re not going to get her now!” I asked him if he had any idea when Diana would be back, and he answered “Try again around 8:30” I said OK and hung up. I didn’t want to talk to him, I was trying to reach Diana! I was a bit peeved because that teenage boy was so rude when I asked for Diana. But I figured it may be worth it if I can get ahold of Diana and still able to get that german shepherd pup. So I waited out the hour. I didn’t feel much like doing anything. Deep inside my soul, I had the feeling that this deal was going to fall through. But I hoped that it wouldn’t. I still got my hopes up that I could still get this puppy.


When 8:30 PM rolled around, I prepared myself to call Diana once again, this time in hopes that I could actually reach her. But at the same time, I just knew that I would likely get nothing but a busy signal again. I dialed, and to my surprise there was a ring!! I was relieved and Diana answered the phone. I literally took a sigh of relief that I was finally able to reach her once again. I was thinking “Thank GOD!!” I apologized to Diana that this is coming late, and Diana dropped a bomb on me! She said “Yes listen, because you did not call me back earlier, I’ve decided not to let you have this pup. You don’t seem really interested in her.” I told Diana that I was gone when she called that afternoon, and I have been trying to call her since around 2PM, but every time I would dial her number, the line was busy! Diana maintained that just because I didn’t call her back before 2PM, she assumed I am just not interested in the puppy. I tried to convince her that I am very interested in the pup. It wasn’t my fault I could not reach her earlier that day. Then Diana stated “Well, if you can’t come here and pick up this puppy, how will you get her to the vet?” OMG! The old “if you don’t have a car how will you get the puppy to the vet” bit came up now! I reminded Diana that she knew I didn’t have a way to drive there when we made the appointment for this morning. And she was OK with that the night before. I also reminded her that her ad in the newspaper said they would deliver.


Diana kept coming up with excuses and shit. She even said “Well, if you don’t have a car, you can’t take this puppy to a vet. I wouldn’t recommend you get a puppy at all. I might recommend you get a cat instead.” I was insulted!! I had 2 persian cats I was trying to get rid of at that time, and this woman is telling me to go out and buy another cat??? NO WAY!!! If I’d wanted a cat, I would have answered ads for a cat. I didn’t want a cat, I wanted a puppy. But I did not mention that to her. I asked Diana if there was any way I could get her to change her mind and let me have the puppy. She said “Not unless you can drive yourself up here to pick her up.” I asked her if she lives on a busline and she said the nearest bus stop is 3 miles away from her. I asked if we could maybe meet someplace nearby and she answered "I don't have the time to drive someplace and meet you. I have other puppies to tend to." I asked to make sure if that’s how she wanted to end this deal and she said “Yes.” I actually said to Diana “Well thanks a lot for wasting my entire day!” and I banged the phone up in her ear!


I was so mad at this point!! Diana ruined and wasted a whole day out of my life! And she was not even willing to take the blame for busying up her phone line so I couldn’t call back when I was supposed to! She seemed to just not even care. I wanted to strangle her. I wanted to just reach through that phone while we were talking and just strangle Diana to death!!! That’s how mad I was at her. I rarely ever reach that point, but I sure reached it with Diana! No other person in my whole life ever made me get that angry. Diana was lucky she was not standing in the room with me at that point because I would have just killed her if she did that to me. It would have been better if she told me the night before that she didn’t want me to have that puppy, or if her ad didn’t state that she’s willing to deliver. But she didn’t say she didn’t want me to have the pup until after I wasted an entire day trying to get ahold of her to no avail, and her ad did state that she’s willing to deliver. I wanted to beat the shit out of her and pull all her hair out by the roots at that point!


What’s even more bizarre about this scenario is I saw another ad placed by Diana in those same classifieds about 6 months later, and again, she said she’s willing to deliver. I saw that and I said “I hope no one else falls for this ad like I did! They try to ask her to deliver her puppy to them, all they’ll get from her is broken promises and excuses why she didn’t want to deliver!” Now I think I know why that teenager was so hostile! Assuming he was maybe her son or something. He’s probably angry at the world for having a mother like Diana who never keeps her promises, always backpedals everything she says, and just makes excuses why she doesn’t want to do something. I would be hostile too!

Monday, July 22, 2013

A Friendly Problem

Its tough to say no to friends. I always like to help one of my friends as much as I can, but sometimes it's not easy being so nice. When a person asks me for a favor, I like to help if I can. Well, I have one friend on Facebook that I am afraid is taking too much advantage of my kindness. She is a sweet person and I like her a lot, but she keeps on asking me if I would post videos and pictures for her onto her new group. I did it a couple of times when her new page was getting started, and I gave her instructions on how she can do it herself. She still continues to ask me to post pics for her on this new page.

The last time I posted a pic for her, she said it would be the last one she would ask me to post. Then she said if I posted that last pic, she would not ask me to post anymore for her. That she would get someone else to do it instead. So I agreed to post the pic for her on that page. Well, she didn't stop asking me like she promised she would. She kept on and on and on asking me to post videos and pictures for her. I told her I just don't have time to do it. That happens every time I give in to posting a picture for her on her new page. She'll ask me to post one, and she'll say that's it. And I do it. Then next thing I know she will ask me to post 3 more pics, and I do it. Then I get her asking me where those pics are, and I can't answer that. If she doesn't see them, and she doesn't know how to look for them, I can't find them either. So I spend the rest of the evening trying to find that stupid picture, or video.

Then she'll ask me to post 4 more pics or videos, and I just can't do it. Because by this time, my internet slows all the way down, and I neglect my other friends, as well as my partner. I don't have the fast internet I used to have anymore. So I cannot keep posting pics or videos for her. And what have I got out of that evening? Absolutely NOTHING! Because it seems she is just never satisfied. I just cannot keep doing it. But I also am not comfortable saying no either. I told her how to post these pics and videos herself, I don't understand why she just won't try it herself. Lately when she asks me to post more pics or videos, I just don't say anything. She posts these pics and videos beautifully in chat, she should be able to post them on her page by herself. I've taken to just ignoring her when she asks me to post more pics. Because I know what will happen. I'll post that one pic, and then she'll ask me to post 2 more, then 4 more. Next thing I know she'd ask me to post 10 more! I just cannot keep doing it for her, when she can learn to do it herself. Now, she's got 2 pages on Facebook to torment me with. I did not ask her to invent this new page.

I hate Facebook lately, and it has nothing to do with her. Facebook has this thing now that it has to keep refreshing it's self every 5 minutes. And every time it does, it slows down. At least on my end it does. It's worse when I go to share pics and videos. I like posting cute pics of cute puppies on my page, or things that make my friends laugh and feel good. But with the internet provided to me through this park, each time I share a picture on Facebook, my internet slows down. It gets so annoying!! You see why I cannot keep posting pics and videos for this friend? If I do, then I have no time to post pics I want to share on my own wall. Thus I don't have time to spend with my other friends. I have one friend going through a life crisis, and I want to be there for her too. And another friend that is going to have a baby in 8 months, I want to be there for her too. And my partner is coming to this country in September, I'm trying to help him get here with as little trouble as possible. I have other friends to help out, I cannot spend every moment on Facebook posting pics and videos for one person onto a page that has less than 40 viewers. Especially when I know she can post the pics and videos herself.

I don't know. Sometimes I think I give too much! Sometimes it gets to me. But most of my friends don't take too much advantage of my kindness. I promised her that I would never unfriend her, and I won't. I still like her. But if she keeps asking me to post pics and videos for her, and she just won't learn to do it herself, I'm gonna have to block her or something. But for now, when she asks, I just don't say anything. Or if we are in the middle of a chat, just change the subject. I don't know what else to do.

Happy Birthday Lily Hutchence!

Wow! 17 years old today! The daughter of Michael Hutchence, named Lily, is 17 today, and she is still quite gorgeous! Looks like those genes from Michael are taking over again. For a while there I was a bit scared. I guess she was going through that awkward teenage period, but she was beginning to look like Paula there for a while. Glad to see she's come out of it, and is looking again like her gorgeous father!


Lily as a baby, with father Michael in the background. Oh yes, Paula is here too. But she's ugly.


Lily as a grown woman.
I love the pic of Lily holding a puppy, so adorable! I can just imagine what Michael is thinking up there in Heaven. Must be bustling with pride that his daughter is taking after him. GOD I hope she doesn't ever show any of those mediocre Paula genes anymore! Hope she doesn't start doing interviews in her underwear!

A lot of INXS fans still call this young woman "tiger". I would never even call my worst enemy that! Let alone Michael's daughter. It's not feminine enough, though I did read it is a real name. It's listed as a boy's name though, or a surname. Besides, tigers are dumb, ugly animals that are doomed to extinction. I don't want to know of that creature having any connections with Michael's daughter. Bad enough Michael is extinct now. But Lily looks happy. And she has a puppy. Shoot! I would be happy too! Give me a house, a puppy, good walking routes, and an easy chair to relax on and I'd be set for life!

Just so hard to believe it's been 17 years since she was brought into the world. Well, she was born in 1996. To me, it just doesn't seem so long ago. In fact it seems like yesterday. If I thought she was reading this, I would give her a present. Any of my stories on the UMG Productions website, for free. But I highly doubt she is reading this. It's OK though. But besides remembering the stories that I wrote that year, and there were a few, I also remember there being a lot of world-shattering changes that happened to me that year too. For one thing, that was the year my waterbed burst and I never got a new mattress for it, so I had to "re-learn" to sleep on a regular bed. Believe me, it was hard at first! I'd been sleeping on a waterbed for 11 years at that time! I didn't think I'd ever get used to sleeping on a regular bed again! Even now I sometimes find it hard!

Well, that may not seem so "world-shattering" to you readers, but it was to me. That was also the year I had the worst kidney infections I've ever had in my life. I rarely drank water back then. Not like I do now. A couple of times I was laid up in bed for more than a week, with a heat pad attached to my back! It hurt to move. And when I had to take a dump, I had to get creative, and clean myself using the handle of a scrub brush we used to use in the shower. That was pure Hell!!

I also remember a Labor Day party my sis and I put on that year. During that time, we did a performance of our history. It was fun! It was like watching the reenacting scenes on the Golden Girls. Only my sis and I were doing the reenacting. I remembered this book about mammals that I began in 1986, and annulled in 1988 because it had accumulated too many pages, I could never fit them all into a book. There used to be this corner in my bedroom where I would sit, sometimes for hours, in front of a hole-punching machine and punch holes in the pages so I could put that book into a binder. It was then I realized that book was too big! It would never fit in any binder available in any store. So I ceased production of that book.

Well, those were just a few bits and pieces. It just doesn't seem like that long ago, but then the years are also getting shorter as I am getting older. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing! I don't even really feel my age! I tell people I am old, and in terms of years, I do feel old. Especially when I see people that I knew as a baby, all grown up now and having kids of their own. But in terms of attitude, I don't feel old. I dunno. I guess that's what counts in this situation. It won't be very long at all before Lily here gets married and has a baby of her own. Maybe it too will look like Michael. I would hope so! NO child should be tormented with Paula's looks! That would be awful! I wonder though if Lily has even got a steady boyfriend? I'd be shocked if she hasn't cuz she is so cute.

Sunday, July 21, 2013

If Patti Had Children

I was actually thinking about this last night. I remember one of the things my former roommate, Patti Killebrew, told me was that she was married but never had kids. Patti was not a bright person, in fact she was downright dumb. And she was abusive. She claimed it was her husband that was abusive. I'm not normally in the habit of saying abuse is the victim's fault, but having lived with Patti for 4 days, I can understand why her ex-husband would beat her up. I'm not a violent person and I can tolerate a lot of hammering and slammering, and there were times while I was living with her that even I wanted to punch her in the face! I think if I had stayed there any longer, and she had continued acting the way she did, eventually I would have done it. Patti never laid a hand on me, which was a good thing for her. But she was abusive emotionally and verbally. I kinda wonder if she was always like that or if she was just senile. Nah, I think I am right. She was feeling the withdrawal effects of not being able to drink a lot of booze, or do her street drugs.

Patti was one of few people that nearly crossed that line with me. Only one person in my whole adult life actually crossed that line where I just get so pissed off I'd rip their hair out by the roots if I could. And it wasn't Patti. That was a breeder of german shepherds that I encountered back in 1998. But I'll get to that story another time. Patti came pretty close to pushing me over the edge, and that's pretty hard to do with me really. But I think a lot of Patti's impatience had to do with her never having children. She said she was married and thank GOD she never got pregnant. Those were her words. I actually thank GOD too, because not having those kids was the nicest thing she could have ever done for them. I was trying to imagine what those poor kids' lives would have been like if Patti had had them, based entirely on how I was treated while I was living with her. I actually made a couple of scenarios, one with a 5 year old named Sarah, and a 3 year old named Ariana. Let's say these were Patti's 2 children with what was now her "abusive" ex-husband.

Imagine it is a Monday night, at around 10:30PM. 5-year old Sarah is tired and heading to bed, Patti walks up behind her to peak as Sarah goes into her bedroom. The bedroom is somewhat messy, with some of Sarah's toys thrown about, the bed is unmade, and crayons pulled out of the box and onto the floor.

Patti says: What is this!? Your room is messy! Clean it up RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!
Sarah: Oh mommy, I'm tired.
Patti: I don't care if you're tired! Clean your room NOW!!!!
Sarah walks into her room crying, and eventually just cries herself to sleep.

The next morning, Patti gets up about 5AM, and opens Sarah's door, as she is still sleeping in her bed.

Patti says: You didn't clean up your room! GET UP NOW!
Sarah: Mommy, I'm tired.
Patti: That's too bad! Get up and clean your room! NOW!!!!!!!!!!

Sarah cannot get up because she got a late start in sleeping the night before, and she is still tired. Patti comes back around 8AM and Sarah is getting ready for school and still has not cleaned her room.

Patti: SARAH! YOU DID NOT CLEAN YOUR ROOM!!!!! GET UP!!!!!!!
Sarah: But mommy, I have to go to school.
Patti: No! You're not going to school! You're gonna stay right there in your room until you've cleaned it! DO IT NOOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!

Sarah starts to cry and sits in her room and tries to clean up. Patti comes in 10 minutes after Sarah starts and Sarah is not finished.

Patti: SARAH! YOUR ROOM IS NOT COMPLETELY CLEAN!! GET UP AND CLEAN IT GOOD!
Sarah: But mommy, I'm trying!
Patti: THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH! CLEAN FASTER!!!! MOVE IT!!!

So poor Sarah continues to work, but because her room was really messy it's taking a while. Patti comes in 4 minutes after her last visit...

Patti: SARAH! YOUR ROOM STILL ISN'T CLEAN ENOUGH!
Sarah: I'm doing it mommy.
Patti: THAT'S IT! I WANT YOU OUT OF THIS HOUSE RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!
Sarah: No mommy please! Don't kick me out of the house!
Patti: I DON'T CARE! I WANT YOU OUT OF THIS HOUSE NOW!!!! PACK YOUR SHIT AND GET OUT!

Sarah starts to cry and beg...

Sarah: Please mommy, give me another chance?
Patti: NO!!! YOU'RE NOT CLEANING YOUR ROOM! SO GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!

Sarah stands in the middle of her room and cries loudly.

Patti: WOULD YOU JUST HURRY UP AND PACK YOUR SHIT YOU'RE GETTING IN MY FACE ABOUT THIS! I WANT YOU OUT!

Sarah packs what she can into a suitcase and sadly walks out the door and onto the streets. So now, all that is left in Patti's house is 3 year old Ariana.
Patti is up past 9:30PM, guzzling down her cheap booze, and there is a pile of dishes in the kitchen that needs cleaning. Ariana is sleeping in her bed. But Patti is so lazy, she does not want to have to do the dishes herself. So she goes to Ariana's room and slams open the door...

Patti: Ariana! The dishes in the kitchen are dirty. Get up and do them! NOW!!
Ariana: I'm tired mommy.
Patti: That's too bad! Get up and do them anyway!

So, after seeing the way Patti treated Sarah, Ariana tries to do what she can to make Patti happy, so she does the dishes. Even though she should be in bed at this hour. She stands up on a step ladder and fills the sink up with hot water. When the water is only 3 inches high in the sink...

Patti: That's enough water!
Ariana: That's not enough water for all these dishes mommy.
Patti: I don't care, I don't want you wasting electricity by using all the hot water!

So Ariana does the best she can. But seeing has how she's only 3 years old, she can't do them very well. And especially in only 3 inches of water! Patti comes in to watch her progress and inspects the dishes that Ariana cleaned already.

Patti: Ariana! This dish is not cleaned properly! And this dish is not really clean! DAMMIT ARIANA! DO THEM ALL OVER AGAIN!!!!

So, wanting to please her mommy, Ariana does them again, and finishes. She drains out the water that has now turned cold. It is 10PM and she is tired and wants to go to bed. Patti comes in and inspects the dishes Ariana did...

Patti: ARIANA!!! THESE DISHES ARE STILL NOT DONE RIGHT!!! GET BACK IN HERE AND DO THEM AGAIN!!!!!!
Ariana: Mommy, I'm tired. Please don't make me do them again.
Patti: YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BED UNTIL YOU DO THESE DISHES!! DO THEM NOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!!!

So, tired, poor Ariana gets back up on her step ladder, and runs the hot water into the sink again. This time the water was only able to get up to 1 inch in the sink, and there is a lot of dishes Ariana has to clean right away.

Patti: THAT'S ENOUGH WATER!! DON'T WASTE THE HOT WATER IN THIS HOUSE!!!
Ariana: But mommy, this isn't enough water for all these dishes.
Patti: STOP THAT WATER RUNNING!!! NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!

So Ariana stops the water, and does the best she can to clean all those dishes in only 1 inch of water. It is 2 hours before she is done, so it is midnight before she gets to bed. Patti went to bed at 11PM. Ariana goes to sleep, believing she did a good enough job on the dishes. The next morning, Patti gets up at about 6AM, and sees the dishes that Ariana washed the night before. She still is not satisfied. So she charges into Ariana's room...

Patti: ARIANA! GET UP AND PACK YOUR STUFF! YOU'RE OUT OF HERE!
Ariana: Why mommy? What did I do?
Patti: YOU DIDN'T CLEAN THE DISHES!
Ariana: I don't want to leave.
Patti: THAT'S TOO BAD! YOU DIDN'T DO THE DISHES! I WANT YOU OUT OF THIS HOUSE RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!
Ariana: I'll do them better mommy.
Patti: NO! YOU SHOULD HAVE DONE THEM RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!!! YOU DIDN'T!!! NOW I WANT YOU OUT OF THIS HOUSE!!!!!!! COME ON!! PACK YOUR STUFF I WANT YOU OUT OF HERE IN 10 MINUTES!!!!!

Ariana starts to cry and packs what she can into a plastic bag. Patti is standing by.

Patti: OH SHUT UP YOU LITTLE CRY-BABY! GET YOUR SHIT PACKED AND GET OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!

Ariana finishes and opens the door to leave. Patti doesn't even give her a good bye nor wish her well. She just coldly looks the other way as Ariana walks out the door with all the belongings she could put in a little plastic shopping bag. Ariana goes off to search for Sarah, but never finds her, because Sarah was kidnapped, raped and murdered the night before.

And yes, to those atheists I encountered last night, I say even that happened for a good reason. Because the last thing this world needs is another Patti.

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Everything Happens For A Reason--Yes!

I was watching a video by MrRepzion on YouTube, and he said he gets annoyed when someone tells him this every time something bad happens to him. He says religious people "use this phrase to give themselves comfort". He even went so far as to tell his fans to challenge someone who says this, so his fans did. Ya know, I like MrRepzion, he's pretty cool. He really cannot help what his fans do. But religious or not, I always believed everything happens for a reason. To challenge a person who say that everything happens for a reason, is the same thing as challenging a vegan about why we should eat meat. And yes, MrRepzion is a meat-eater! LOL! No, I'm not making fun, but it's the same damn thing. People want clear-cut explanations for everything, and like I've said before, not everything has a clear-cut answer. I am religious. I am not a part of any organized religion, but I am religious. I've tried like 4 different religions in my life, and the problem I have with them is that I don't agree 100% with all of what they believe. But religious or not, I still believe everything happens for a reason.

The reason I believe this is because I've seen it work before. MrRepzion believes that because his great aunt, who was deaf and could not communicate in the 60s, was gang raped while on a date. He said she learned nothing from that experience except how to hate men. He doesn't believe any good came out of that experience. I agree it must have been horrible for his great aunt. I can imagine. But there is still a good reason that happened. Maybe that incident, or a similar incident that maybe those same men were responsible for, led to stronger laws against rape that we have today. One never knows. But if you sit around and tell people to go challenge someone who says "It all happened for a reason", I think that's more of a regressive attitude.

MrRepzion and other atheists for that matter, use all the bad things in the world to give them an excuse to not believe in GOD. While I don't want to force anyone to believe in GOD, that's not my business after all, I think it's just as annoying when people use bad things that happen to say "there is no GOD". I've been through a lot in my life. I've been through some of the worst bullies in my time that I think I've ever known. When I was in 4th grade, there was this girl who kept beating me up every day. But she wasn't even half as bad as the bullies I encountered in Jr. high school. These boys used to literally gang up on me to harass me to the point where I almost became suicidal. I was scared to go to school because of them. My ma and pa were not quite as supportive as they could have been. They kept telling me I'll get through it. My ma did go and talk to the teachers in the class I had with those boys, and it only made everything between me and those boys get much worse. Then they started teasing me because I told my ma I was being harassed. You know how older kids are about that. And in Jr. High, it wasn't just the kids I had bullying problems with, some of the teachers in that school were bullies too. Like Mr. Purvis and his cohorts. And with them the bullying was worse because I could not tell anyone about it. The adults in that school would just side with the teachers.

Well, now, there are stricter laws against bullying. While I admit it did not help me when I was in school, I like to think my experiences had something to do with getting laws like this passed. Now, schools have become more aware of what happens to kids that have been bullied and are doing things now to nip them in the butt before they get worse. I like the idea of that. It comforts me to know that perhaps in the forseeable future, no other kid will have to go through what I went through.

Unfortunately people who rebut the idea of "everything happens for a reason" will not see it that way. Because they live only in the "here and now". Because the reason isn't presented to them RIGHT NOW, then there must not be any good reason it happened. But I've lived long enough to know something will come of everything. So that is how I live my life. It really has NOTHING at all to do with my belief in GOD. I believe that this is just how the world works. We all suffer damages, we all have bad things happen in our lives. But it might be because of those bad things happening that a greater good comes out of it.

Ya know, this is what I hate about fanatical atheists! And fanatical vegans, and even fanatical Christians! They all say the same dumb shit every time. I like to let people have their beliefs, because we are all human and we have a right to believe what we want. But fanatics always try to push their beliefs on others. I like MrRepzion, but in this video, he started to sound like a fanatical atheist, and it was kindof annoying. Fanatical atheists will always say "because something bad happened to so-n-so, something good will come of it?!" It's like the vegans saying "How can you love some animals and eat others?" Or even Christians saying "This happened to you because you didn't go to church" or whatever!! Fanatics are annoying on every level!!

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Onision Drama

This is a very hot topic going around YouTube, and I've seen many different peoples' opinions on this subject. Onision started doing live debates with some people, which totally surprised me, as he does not like criticism. Not even constructive criticism. It's amazing! Anyone who criticizes Onision is labeled by him as a "hater". Onision is nothing but an overgrown little boy. But then again he really is no different than anyone else his age! These days it's getting to where you have to have permission to give someone constructive criticism. There is a total difference between giving criticism and being a "hater". The best examples of what a "hater" would be like would be the dirty dozen mob. Haters act out of malice. They don't care about how other people are affected by someone's actions. Their only concern is in satisfying some deep, dark, sadistic desire to ruin someone else's life. Mostly because they have nothing better to do with their time. But all the people who criticize Onision do not appear to be like this at all. In fact the majority of them that I have seen all have the same concern. Most of Onision's fanbase is made up of young teenagers, and they are likely to take what Onision says very seriously. Onision has told rape victims that it is their own fault that they got raped. He has told victims of abuse that it is their own fault they've been abused. A rape victim does not need to be told that they were raped because it was their fault! That's not true! I was once (almost) a victim of rape, and believe me, it's not like I advertised! I was just sitting and reading when the attempted rapist approached me. Luckily I am not a very submissive person, otherwise he might have overtaken me. He was inexperienced anyway, as rapists go.

But see, that is the point. People criticize Onision for saying things like that, and Onision immediately labels these people as "haters". They are not haters. They are trying to get Onision to look at what he is saying to his fans, and how wrong he is to point the accusing finger at the victims, instead of pointing the finger at the monsters who commit these acts against innocent people. He's even labeled Encyclopedia Dramatica as a "hate site". Shoot! I LOVE my entry in Encyclopedia Dramatica!! Every time I see it, I get a good belly-laugh! In fact, I have it bookmarked in my favorites in a folder I labeled "For Laughs". It shows how very complex I am. Because the person who wrote it is so far offbase about my personality, it's totally unrecognizable to those who do know me very well. In fact, the only thing the author of my article got 100% correct is that I totally HATE panthers! Every time I am feeling down, I go to my page in Encyclopedia Dramatica and get a good laugh out of it. It perks me up! If only Onision could do the same thing. But he is so low in self-esteem, he can't even take a joke on himself.

Well, in the latest development Onision's new wife is expecting his child soon. His new wife, BTW, is only 18, and Onision is almost 30. Well, Onision so badly wanted to debate with another YouTube user named MrRepzion, and MrRepzion said no, that Onision created a character on his live debate on July 4th, which he called "Repsock". That is, he made a sock puppet figure of MrRepzion and debated with that sock for an hour on live video. A lot of people say that now Onision has gone over the edge! I was watching the video and just in the first 2 minutes of the video, Onision already sounds like a crazed psychotic maniac. It's rather creepy. Onision is butthurt because MrRepzion said no when Onision asked to debate with him. A normal person, with a teaspoonful of brains, would have just said "OK. Fine with me" and moved on. But not Onision. He has to create a sock puppet in view of MrRepzion and create this nutty video. It's like he's jabbing MrRepzion, hoping he would fight back. I think this is why Onision gets so much bad press. He literally asks for it! I feel sorry for his wife. I hope soon she gets the good sense to take her baby and leave this nut!! I can just imagine the influence Onision would have on that baby, judging by his debate with this so-called Repsock, and the fact that he blames the victims for crimes committed against them. Not to mention the disrespectful way he has treated his past wives. He said he never had any father figure in his life. I guess this proves that children have to have a mother AND a father in their early formative years. I once heard someone say they've never known a child to come out right without a father around. I can see from Onision that this is true too! Him and a bunch of other youngsters around today, since marriage now is so obsolete.

Well, that's all I have to say on this subject. I don't want to give Onision too much credit, but go to YouTube and search for Repsock. If he hasn't taken the video down (and I advise you he will as soon as it receives a lot of negative attention), you'll find his debate with that dumb sock puppet! He talks to it like it is a real, breathing individual! UGH!!

****************************EDIT TO ADD*********************************

Here's how to tell the difference between a "hater" and someone who is just giving constructive criticism. I learned this by watching the Dirty Dozen mob on the Pluba forums.

1. A hater will always call you childish names. Whereas someone giving criticism won't usually in their initial comment to you. Unless you antagonize them.

2. Haters are narcissistic, they don't care about the people your speech is affecting. They only care about themselves. Sometimes their "care" will extend out to their closest associates and friends. Whereas someone giving criticism does care about everyone you speak to.

3. When you totally ignore a hater, they will often go somewhere else and hassle someone else they can find. Whereas someone who is just giving criticism will continue to give criticism, and usually will add in "You make some valid points, but..."

4. Haters tend to make up things to make you look worse than you really are, like "I saw this fat bitch chowing down at McDonald's the other day", whereas someone giving criticism would simply ask "Have you ever been to a McDonald's?"

5. Haters blame you for everything, even when you had no impact in instigating anything wrong. Someone giving criticism will have proof to present that you personally were responsible before making any accusations.

6. Haters sometimes travel in groups. They need their friends to help them in their personal vendetta against you. Whereas someone just giving criticism just speaks their mind. With or without help from friends.

7. Haters act on self-worth. They often have a lot of fans that will cheer them on. Someone giving criticism may not have as many fans, but they say what they say because they care about the problems your speech and ideas may cause.

8. Sometimes someone giving criticism can become a hater. But that is usually because the person they target provokes them into it.

9. A hater will always be hateful to you, even if you are trying to be nice to them. Whereas someone just giving criticism will sweeten their tone a bit.

10. Haters usually act anonymously. That is they never post any recent pictures or videos of themselves online, because they are more likely fat, ugly, nasty bitches themselves. I've seen haters post 20 year old pics of themselves and say they still look like that today. Someone giving constructive criticism does not care. Because they are not doing what they do to "prove" they are better than anyone else. They only do it to get the offender to see what they are doing is wrong.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Bird Brain

Geez! It's been so long since I last wrote a post on this blog! I've been so busy lately I haven't had much time to croak out a post. So that is why I am writing today, updating. So much has gone on I wanted to post something on here. Shoot I haven't even been able to chat with my sis lately. Not that I didn't want to, I just don't have time to anymore. My partner keeps me busy. He says hard work is the key to success. He's right too. I totally agree. He's going to be a huge success one day. He works even harder than I do. LOL! Well, he knows the business better than I do. But it doesn't leave me much time to spend with my buds online, or my family.

First I want to give a congrats to a friend of mine from Facebook, who is finally expecting her first child. Congrats Wendy! May your baby bring you much joy and blessings. I always hoped she would have a baby, because she told me once in a comment that she was pregnant before and the baby got aborted after she was mugged and brutally beaten. I felt terrible for her. So I always hoped she would have another one. Thank the LORD now she is.

I have been going into Facebook, and I've gained a few friends. One person friended me one day, then deleted me the next day. That was rather odd. But that's OK by me! It's not like I really knew who she was, or that we ever talked or anything. The strange thing about that was, I was still getting notifications about her on my feed page. Well, now Facebook has something else going. Somehow, I don't know how, but somehow this "friend" got stuck on my subscriptions, so I had to go to her page and unsubscribe. Usually, when someone unfriends me, that's it. That's the end of the show with them as far as I'm concerned. I don't care to ever hear from, or see, them again. Unless they're family, ya know. LOL! It's a lot easier for me to let go of someone who has deleted me, than it is for me to let go of someone I deleted. I always feel bad deleting someone from my friends. I'm just not the type to do that. But this subscription thing is weird! I recently had a guy, a young guy, who was a catfag delete me, his name was Adam George. He was heavily into GOD and Jesus, but at the same time, was a catfag. He deleted me because he posted a picture of a fireman rescuing a cat from a burning house. I said "Dumb as cats are, he probably scratched the man and ran back into the fire." It's probably true too!! LOL! Well, Adam got butthurt and deleted me from his friend list. When I found out he did that I said "Good! Now if only all feline-faggots would delete me, life would be better!"

I don't mean the people who just like cats and are OK with me not liking them. I mean the people like Adam. Though he said he was OK with me not liking cats, he said it in a way that he sounded really butthurt and angry by it. Thus, I call him a catfag, and others like him. Actually, I told one friend the absolute gospel truth about my feelings about cats. I don't really hate them. I just like to tease the catfags by saying I do. It's funny seeing their reactions. Most of them are hypocrites too. Adam hated snakes, called them Satan, and wanted to see them all destroyed, yet he hated it because I said cats are dumb animals, and said he was going to pray for me for feeling so much hate. LOL! Hypocrisy at it's finest! I do hate panthers of any kind. But I don't really HATE cats. The way I feel about cats is exactly the same way I feel about people. I neither love them, nor hate them. I tolerate them, as long as they're not in my house! Sometimes I worry about my sis. She sometimes acts like a catfag too. Yet she says she's not.

I don't care frankly if I lose friends. I don't like people anyway. So, it doesn't bother me. I will be loyal to my friends, I will stand by them through thick and thin. I will never give up on them. But I can just as easily let go of someone who has cut all association with me too. It's not hard for me. At my age, one does not want to waste time worrying about why someone doesn't like them. It's all past, and it doesn't matter anymore. Like my ma phrases "They're dead and stinking now." Let them go. So I do.

Speaking of hypocrisy, I got into a bit of a debate with a woman named Lesley on Facebook because she believed Michael Jackson had a skin condition. I told her that's a myth. She didn't believe it was and said "I'm not gonna judge". I laughed when I saw that statement coming from her! She sits and judges people all the time (believe me, I am not the first among her friends to notice this behavior coming from her!) But then the people she judges are not celebrities. Ya know I hate people like her! That's why I never asked her to become my friend on Facebook. I just can't get to like her that much. I remember I did used to have her among my friends on my first Timmy-Love Space on MySpace, but I never asked her to become my friend again after that site was deleted. She's not a totally evil person. She just doesn't judge celebrities, while sitting there judging the common person. Well, what can I say? She's a catholic. With a last name like her's she's gotta be a catholic! This is why so many catholics become atheists. They're the most judgmental group of people on the planet! Next to Baptists. Well, Lesley said she didn't want to argue, and I didn't want to hijack my friend's post, so I cut out of the debate. But I still say it was a myth that Michael Jackson had a skin condition. As for his kids, I don't think they are Jackson's biological kids at all. In fact, in their preteen pics, they look more like Macaulay Culkin than Michael Jackson. They probably are his kids too.

As for MJ's skin condition, here is a pic of him in his early stages of the disease.

 
As you can see his complexion is more pale, but it's not blotchy. Here's a pic of the normal first stages of Vitiligo, which most people say MJ had:


Here's another example:


As you can see, this disease leaves spots, not the entire body, discolored. I will forever believe that MJ bleached his skin because he was ashamed of his race. One of my friends, who was a die-hard MJ fan, said that she heard him say that. I never met Michael J. I never wanted to! I have very little interest in him, especially since hearing about him molesting children. I'll get to that in a minute. I don't deny MJ had talent, but he is not among my favorite celebs for various reasons. It has nothing to do with him possibly having a disease, or him being black or white, or whatever color he happened to be, or if he was gay. I just don't like him.

His fans and followers can say whatever they want about him, but he did molest children on 3 separate occasions! The kids admitted it. MJ denied it to keep himself out of scrutiny and conjecture, because what else is going to happen when people find out MJ was a child molester? He would lose his money, estate, record sales, etc. In short, he'd have been screwed! So he denied all those claims, and some short-sighted judge believed him. Probably for the same reason Lesley believes him, because he's the so-called "King of pop". If he were a regular person like me, who's never been that much in the public spotlight, he would have had his ass handed to him in a plastic cup! I feel sorry for Lesley, she thinks every celebrity is her own possession to fiercely defend. No one can have a differing opinion about them around her without her getting butthurt. But I don't care if someone agrees with me or not. I say what I know. If it's secondhand knowledge, who cares?! It had to come from somewhere.

Anyway, notice how I have titled this blog "Bird Brain"? I was thinking about birds today, and how much I adore birds of all kinds. Even vultures. But my most favorite birds, if I had to pick just one, has got to be crows. I think crows are awesome. One of my friends says she has love-hate feelings for them. LOL! That's understandable too. I love crows because they are the most intelligent of birds. Ya know, birds are much more intelligent than most people give them credit for. Look at how many birds are able to learn how to talk. Like parrots, mynahs, and yes crows. How many mammals, besides humans and apes, have learned how to talk. And then apes are only capable of learning sign language. Don't get me wrong, I love apes! I think they're fascinating! I think in many aspects, birds are more intelligent than mammals. I'd love to have my finches back! I used to have a variety of ornamental finches. I was going to start an aviary. But then when I moved in with Patti and Chris for that live-in nanny job, I couldn't have my birds anymore because they lived on base, and were only allowed to have a couple of pets per household. Since they already had 2 dogs, I had to sell all my birds. You know what I should have done? I should have kept all my birds and got rid of Patti and Chris instead!!

Anyway, since birds are so smart, maybe being called a "bird brain" is not such a bad thing. Perhaps it is a compliment. Birds are capable of learning, and learn faster than most mammals.

Well, Anna still has nobody living next to her, in Irma's old apartment. I got that out of her when I was able to chat with her the other night. Poor Irma passed away, and she was one of the nicest people there. Someone else was going to move into the apartment where Irma used to live, but it was Karen Schuller's mom. I was thinking "Oh no!" Then my sis told me that her mom died before she could move in. I said "Thank GOD for small favors!" I'm not happy that her mom died, but I am happy it happened before she could move next door to my sis! If she is anything like her daughter Karen, it wouldn't have been fun for Anna! Karen Schuller is so stuck-up! You know what they say, like mother, like daughter. I'd rather someone moved next door to Anna that is nice, someone she can talk to and relate to. Someone like Irma, in a sense. I told Anna what I should do is move next door to her, then both of us could make Roger's life a living hell! LOL! But no, I don't want to move back to Bozeman. I was truly not happy there. I never liked it to begin with. I belong here, in WA state. Or at the very least, the Oregon coast. I'm used to marine weather. I'm not used to the desert that Bozeman was.

Oh yes, one more thing I forgot to mention. I have it on good authority that our old manager got fired. She was fired because she's just never around. So now, our manager is another woman I met named Karen D. She lives just a couple of plots from me, and she is really nice. She also has a cool bench swing. She said she also noticed Kelly was not the nicest person. I told her I found that out when I tried calling her one day. Kelly wasn't at all like Carolyn was! Well anyway, I'm glad she's no longer the manager of this park.

Well, that was pretty much my month. I don't know when I will make another blog post. Perhaps soon, before the end of the month. I hope so, but it really depends on my schedule.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Another Good Chihuahua Owner

Oh wow! I remember some years back, Dustingrey got on a video I was on in YouTube and said that little dogs were for "fags and cunts". This led to me asking him what made him say that, which led him into massive butt-hurt, and stalking me for a year before I finally blocked him on YouTube. Now, not that I haven't seen it before, but a lot of really big people own chihuahuas. I think it brings out their tender side. There is a man, and even I wouldn't try to cross him, his name is Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, and he owns a Chihuahua. I would just LOVE to see Dustingrey call this guy a fag or a cunt. Anyway, the end result would be fun to watch. The Rock is a big dude!! Dustingrey, when I saw him, was an ugly, skinny, non-muscled mess. Looked like a cross between a chicken and a goat. Of course I have not seen him in years, unless he's been posting on my videos under another name (I wouldn't put it past him). But I would certainly not be foolish enough to call this dude a fag or a cunt if I wanted to stay out of the emergency room.


Look at those muscles! Look at that sweet baby of his!! Actually he is NOT the first big guy I've ever seen who owns a Chihuahua. I used to know a biker guy who had a Chihuahua, and he had muscles like this guy. Again, I would not have called that guy a fag or a cunt! I don't think it makes a person look weak to own a small dog. In fact, just the opposite. It makes the guy look very sure of himself. What I think makes people look weak are those who think owning big dogs makes them look tougher. Those people are totally insecure. I know there are those who simply prefer bigger dogs, and that is fine. But it's those who think a person who owns a littler dog has such because they are a weaker person and that owning a big dog makes them seem like a better, tougher individual, those are the people I don't like. Those are the people that are very insecure, and the only reason they own big dogs is for some kind of status symbol. That disgusts me. They don't love their dog. What they love is the feeling that owning a big dog makes them feel tougher, and that they can conquer the world. I feel sorry for those dogs.

But a guy like The Rock, I love this picture! If a guy like that can own a Chihuahua, it tells me that he does not give a shit about the stereotypes going around these days. He only cares that he loves his dog, and that his dog loves him.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Manager Flew The Coup

Well, I hate to say this, but I think our manager here flew the coup! I've been looking for them for days now, and I haven't seen hide nor hair of them. I needed to turn my rent checks in to them, and I also needed to talk to them about why I am only able to pay a smaller portion of the rent for this camper. But they were not around, and so I had to do what I didn't want to do. But I guess everyone else here does. I had to send my rent checks to the head office in Sequim. I told that manager I didn't know what else to do since we don't seem to have a manager in this park anymore. Anyway I haven't seen them in quite a few days. A lot of people want to know what happened. Our maintenance guy Paul was here yesterday looking for the manager, and they were not in. So Paul just up and left. Today, I went to seek out the manager again, and there was a woman waiting to look at an available trailer, and she asked me if the manager is in. I just told her the manager has not been here in days. I don't know what happened.

Now that we don't have a manager anymore, I wonder what is going to happen? Who is going to maintain this park? This really kinda sucks. What if there is a problem? You know, this is why I really miss Carolyn. At least she was always here. If she wasn't here, she eventually would be back the next day. If there was a problem, Carolyn took care of it right away. But this manager disappears for days, and I have no idea where they went to. She's not even the friendliest manager I've ever known. When I spoke to her, she seemed rather stand-offish. And I really wish she would not disappear for days, or weeks, without getting someone else to fill in for her. I don't know what happened to her or her husband. If they did go off on some kind of vacation, I wish they would not even think to do something like that until after the beginning of the month, when the rent is due.

Ya know, my ma does not want me to say anything bad about this manager, but I cannot help it! I've been needing to talk to them for the past few days, and they have not been here. I had no choice but to send my rent check to the head office, with a note explaining why my payment for this trailer is lower than usual. I'm kinda hoping that the manager sees this post on this blog and responds. Maybe it will make her a better manager. I had to tell the main office that they just left, and now we have no manager in this park. Maybe the dirty dozen mob will forward this blog post to the manager of this park like they did to the apartment complex back in Bozeman. I hope so! I don't know if it'll do them any good though, this manager is never here. Or is rarely here!

Subject Change*************************************

Well, I had a wonderful birthday. And it continues still. I got a gift card from a friend on Facebook. It's good at Target, so I said when my sis gives me my bday gift from her, I will go to the Target store in Port Townsend and pick out something. It has to be something worth no more than $10, and it cannot be something edible. Well, that's a rule I made up myself. It CAN be edible, but I don't want it to be. hehehe! I don't like getting anything as a gift that won't last me a long time. That way, a year from now, I can look at that gift and say "My friend from Facebook gave me this in 2013". Who knows? Maybe there will be a story accumulated behind it. From there, I plan to capture the ferry to Seattle and ride the Great Wheel. I also intend on making a movie about it too. My ma gave me a Walmart gift card worth $20, and I used it to buy this awesome clock for my bedroom. I just LOVE it!!!! It's very plain to look at, but it is an awesome clock! It's radio controlled. So I don't have to set the time on it myself. It does it automatically. My pa came here and we did the town a bit. Kathy wasn't here. She's in Arizona with her daughter. Kathy apparently does not like Port Angeles.

I cannot say I am sorry Stephanie moved away. I don't get along too well with Kathy's kids. I'd like to think of them as family, but I cannot. Anna is friends with Stephanie on Facebook, but I am not, and there is a reason for that. I don't allow anyone on my Facebook that I do not trust. And I don't trust Kathy's kids. Anna reminded me of when we were younger and she took a course in hair-dressing at the local vocational school. She said the main reason she quit that class was because there was someone in that class that was a friend of Jennifer's, who is Kathy's other daughter, Stephanie's sister. Well, this friend would constantly tell Jennifer what Anna was doing in that class, and Jennifer in turn would tell our pa. Next thing Anna knows, our pa would give her long lectures, or yell at her, and Anna eventually got sick of that, and quit the class. It jogged my memory a bit as to why I am not friends with either Stephanie or Jennifer on Facebook. I barely tolerate Kathy on there! I only accepted her because I like to hear from time to time what my father is up to. If there was a way I could just friend my pa, and drop Kathy, believe me I would!!

I am glad Kathy is not my mother!! I thought Kathy was a good person, but she got pissed off at me because Anna chose to stay in Montana, while I wanted to move back here! And Kathy carries a grudge!! She's like a little girl who gets mad at her parents when she gets yelled at, and gives the parents the silent treatment. She also threatened to leave my pa if I ever came and stayed at their place again. Does that sound like something a real mother would do?? Even a step-mother?? Not to me! Doesn't even sound like something someone would do who is supposed to love my father! And the reason she said that. She never even heard my side of the story. She just heard my father's side and thought that was the be-all, end-all to the story. But even my pa doesn't know why I did what I did while I spent that weekend with him. I never told him. So he couldn't very well tell Kathy. But Kathy believes him. Kathy can be a sweet person sometimes. I even told my own ma she's a good person. Oh BOY!!! But she can be sweet at chosen periods. It could be old age causing her to act like an ass sometimes. Or it could be the breast cancer she had to battle recently. I could be more understanding, and it would be easier if I knew what Kathy's problem was. I love Kathy, but sometimes I find it hard to like her.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Amy's Baking Company

Located in Scottsdale, AZ, this company created a first in Kitchen Nightmares a week ago. It became the first place that Gordon Ramsay just up and walked out on. Don't believe me? See for yourself!



It's over 40 minutes long, but it tells the whole story. Amy, the owner, and her husband Samy, cannot take any form of criticism. Amy says she will stand up and fight for her restaurant, and she's not going to take no shit from no one, and that no one is going to bash her food in her own restaurant, and blah-blah-blah. I hear that and I think "How dumb can one person be??" Amy says the customers are not always right, and I heard in this video they were even saying to a customer that was complaining about their food, these two idiots told those customers "You don't know how to eat!" What a retarded comment! How can someone not know how to eat? I don't think it's that the customer doesn't know how to eat, it's that the chef doesn't know how to cook. We're born knowing how to eat.

If I treated our customers at UMG the way these people treat customers that come into their restaurant, my supervisor would be FURIOUS!!! Yes, the customer is ALWAYS right! They are the ones paying you the money! They want satisfaction. This reminds me of a little burger joint that was in the B&I back in the 90s. I only ate there once. It was run by Koreans. They had some good burgers, but the thing that bothered me most about their place is they had a sign by the cash register that read "Even if we make a mistake on your order, you still have to pay for it. We do not give you free food!" When I saw that sign, I said to the teller "OK, I'm going to give you my order slowly so you don't make a mistake..." They did not make a mistake, and the burger was good, but I still did not ever want to eat there again, because if they were to ever make a mistake on my order, and I had to pay for it, I would be pissed!!

Anyway, if a customer ever tells us that any story in the UMG site is bad, or what is wrong with it, we are not supposed to tell them, "You are insane" or "You don't know how to read". We cannot cuss them out because they don't like the story. Trisha says every critique is a learning experience. That's the only way we can learn what the customer likes about each story and what they don't like. That way we can improve our stories in the future. When you don't learn, you don't grow. Apparently, Amy's Baking Company closed down after Gordon Ramsay left them, that's what I heard Amy always does when she has a bad night. They are re-opening on the 21st of this month. From what I heard, they are already booked up for their re-opening. I was glancing through the comments on that page, and someone said that they know a couple of people who booked for the re-opening, not for the food. They're going for the floor show. They want to see Amy and Samy break down and yell at the customers like apparently they always do.

Well, I listened to Amy's story. I think I know what is wrong with her. If you listen, she does not have kids, she has cats. She calls those her kids. Then she goes on to say "I speak feline." Of course she has cats!! I knew that even before she mentioned anything about them in this episode! She's definitely crazy enough. Cats are known to make people go crazy. The funny thing is, cat people don't know they're crazy. But the rest of us, who don't own cats, can see it very well. It's a certain kind of craziness that no other individual would have, it's just short of requisition to an asylum. That describes this Amy chick to a T. Amy and Samy tell people who go into their restaurant and don't like their food to "leave and never come back again" on top of telling them they "don't know how to eat". They basically handle everything in a very unprofessional manner. They act like a couple of spoiled brats. In this episode, they fired one young waitress just because she asked Amy a question. Then Amy accuses the waitress of being obnoxious, just because she asked a question. UGH!! Amy and Sami kept sitting there, in front of Gordon Ramsay, arguing with each other.

I have the feeling Amy was never disciplined as a child. I think her parents probably just let her get away with anything she wanted to. Some things she says and does in this video kindof point out that possibility. And she talks a lot about GOD, like she probably should be running a church (a Baptist church) instead of a restaurant! I turn to GOD myself, but I am not like Amy! Amy is obviously very bitter. She needs to grow up. She needs to get rid of those 3 cats, get on some medications for the damage those cats caused her brain to have, and get a dog instead. She also needs to get rid of Samy, he's very controlling. Believe me when I say living with a very controlling person can ruin your psyche. That's why I am so glad to be out of Patti's house!! Staying there would have eventually ruined me. But the place is open. If you live anywhere near Scottsdale, AZ, go there that night. I bet you the place will be booming with anger, rage and hatred from the proprietors.

But seriously, after seeing this video, would you really want to eat there???? I wouldn't. No matter what promises these two make.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Fans of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev

Who all is surprised by this?? I heard about this in a video and I started thinking "Oh my GOD! It's happening!" I am shocked, but not surprised by this outcome after the Boston Marathon incident that happened a month or so ago. But it seems the suspect, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, has amassed a huge following of fangirls. I knew this was going to happen. First panther-worship, and now this. It had to happen! People worship panthers, so why not terrorists? Afterall, panthers and terrorists are of the same ilk. People love lions. Lions kill for fun. So why not love Dzhokhar Tsarnaev? He kills for fun too. He killed an 8 year old child and did not even flitch. Lions kill hyenas and don't give any second thoughts about it. Sure! It was bound to happen. That is why I am not surprised kids these days think Dzhokhar Tsarnaev is some kind of a hero. Panthers, as mindless killers, are seen as wonderful in the eyes of children these days. They've been over-embellished. So yeah, in the minds of kids, it's obvious that this was going to happen.

I still have to ask, what has gotten into kids these days???!!! If I had a child and she saw Dzhokhar Tsarnaev as being in some way "handsome", I think I would ask that of this child. The guy killed innocent people. People who were out to do nothing but have fun in their day. Instead they got bombed, injured, some people lost limbs, a few even lost their lives. How can someone think about the person who perpetrated this act being handsome? All I see is an ugly, vicious killer who deserves to suffer. He deserves to be put in jail and not have any admirers. Ted Bundy, yeah, he was nice-looking. But I would never see him as anything more than a mindless killer who deserved to die.

Ya know there is an episode of the Brady Bunch like this. Where the youngest boy sees Jesse James as a hero. Then in the show he meets someone who had a relative that was killed by Jesse James and it changes the little boy's mind about seeing that outlaw as a hero. I'm not so sure if talking to the parents of the child who was killed by Dzhokhar Tsarnaev would change the minds of these fangirls. Kids today just have no conscience. They'd be like "so what? Your kid got killed, it's your fault. Not Dzhokhar's." That's how I believe most of his fangirls would react. But all I can say is put yourself in the place of the people who got hurt, or lost loved ones. What would you say then? This is also how I can hate panthers with such passion, because I put myself in the place of people who have been attacked by them, or have lost family and friends to panthers of one kind or another. And even when I see a lion chasing a hyena. I can picture what is going through the mind of that hyena. If the lion was defending it's family, that would be different. But these days, lions seem to have gone psycho, and are now just killing hyenas for nothing more than the sake of killing them. Must be the result of inbreeding.

This was why, when we had a rat problem in the house, I was more willing to have a rat-hunting terrier than a cat. Cats torture rats. Dogs just kill them quickly and outright. I am not one who would want to see a rat get tortured. Besides, the rat might get away, and get back into the house. With a terrier, there is none of that to worry about. The rat is killed instantly and in a flash. But anyway, back to the point. I just don't understand kids these days. It kinda saddens me. But we have only our economy to blame. Parents are no longer allowed to teach kids right from wrong. Kids don't know that what Dzhokhar Tsarnaev did was wrong. We cannot punish our kids, and kids are learning bad things from playing violent video games. Though I have read that video games teach kids problem-solving skills. I am not too sure though that every kid who plays video games are getting the message. With what they see on TV, and the fact that parents can no longer discipline their kids, kids these days just cannot seem to make the connection between right and wrong. I'll tell you when I was  a kid, if I did half the things I see kids these days doing, I would have been slapped into the middle of the following week! Kids today have no fear of authority, and as a result, we are seeing more kids out there killing. Or thinking it's fun to kill, or seeing killers like Dzhokhar Tsarnaev as heroes. When I was younger, that was a sight that was rare! Kids rarely killed each other.

That's nothing. When my ma was a girl, she told me kids (this was the 50s and 60s in the South) used to carry knives to school. They never thought of using them on each other. That's just how kids were back then. Kids killing kids is not new, it's just more common now. It's sad. It's terrible!! It's one of the big reasons why I did not want to have kids. I would just die if my child died at the hands of some maniacal kid in school. The Columbine incident really changed my mind about that. At the same time, I would not want to see my child bullied.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Up Abercrombie's Ass!

I was watching a video this morning and it was about the famous mall chain-store called Abercrombie, and it's partner store Fitch. Mike Jeffries is the CEO, and guess what he said. He said he doesn't want no fat or ugly people shopping in his store. If a fat or ugly person walks into an Abercrombie store, they have workers who will escort them out. Jeffries says he only wants "thin, attractive and popular people" wearing his clothes because he thinks it will give his clothing line a bad name. UGH!!! People like him piss me off! Who gives a shit about the so-called "popular kids"?? And if you ask me, having known the 'popular crowd' when I was growing up, anything they do would be tarnished because they were the most stuck-up and mentally corrupt people I ever met in my life! I never wanted to be popular. I never wanted to hang with the popular kids. Because as  people, they sucked! They only cared about themselves. No one else, not even the people they considered friends.

Well, fat and ugly people are not the only ones not allowed to walk into an Abercrombie store. If you are over 50, you are also not allowed. Not only that, but also if you are poor, you are not allowed to wear his clothes. And any clothes that don't pass inspection are just thrown away. They don't even donate them to charity. So, just like the popular kids I remember in school, the CEO of Abercrombie only cares about himself. No one else. If you ask me, he doesn't need fat, ugly, unpopular, poor or old people to make his clothes look bad. Mike Jeffries is making his own clothing line look bad on his own. And ya know, after hearing these quotes, I was dying to see what little Mr. Mike Jeffries looks like himself. I found some good pics of him. Check this out:


So he doesn't want fat and ugly people going into his store. Umm, excuse me, I think I can tell what is ugly, and this dude is UGLY!!!! So, is he not allowed to shop in his own store? I mean really! Look at his eyes. Look at his lips. Look at his double-chins. He's not only ugly, he's fugly, and he's an old fart too. I think a guy in this video I saw this morning said what I was thinking very well. He looks like he's had so much botox injected in his face that it looks like his mouth is permanently looking for a dick to suck. Well, it's true!

Look at this other comparison I found:


Of course his head was photoshopped on that body. But this is his real face, seen at a different angle. He has eyes like a tiger (not a compliment). That's what his eyes remind me of. This was next to a picture of this:


IMO, they both look alike. Both look like something someone would spit up into the toilet, and then flush quickly. After reading all this, I have a good mind to go to the nearest Abercrombie store and just walk in, and if any of the workers put their hands on me, phone the cops! If they argue, I should argue back! Just see what kind of reaction I'd get. It'd serve them right if I did that! I would be the fattest, ugliest person they could encounter in their store. I should go in and give them a scare.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Why I Refuse to Go Vegan

I thought it would be a great idea to talk about why I refuse to go vegan. I have some vegan friends on (and off) Facebook, and they are always giving their reasons why they want everyone to go vegan. They say things like "eating meat and drinking milk is not a personal choice, it promotes cruelty". Well, they see things differently than I do. As a writer and an artist, it's in my nature not to see things the way other people do. I look at things in totally different prospective. For one thing, I don't listen to corporations like PETA, ALF or Gary Yourofsky. That's because I know they're biased. I don't listen to biased people. They want the world to stop eating animals, so they will say any stupid thing to get us to listen. It's no different than a car sales man trying to sell a car on it's last wheel to an unsuspecting buyer by saying "this can be very easily fixed with a few turns with a screwdriver".

Another thing, the vegans try to make animals sound like they are in the same class as humans. Most animals are not. Especially animals that we eat. Cattle, pigs, chickens, etc. They don't feel emotions the same way people do. I know, I've been watching nature shows for years. I saw a video the other day, purely out of curiosity. It was about a leopard in Sri Lanka attacking a small herd of wild pigs. The leopard took a baby pig. While the mother did try to defend the baby, the leopard got away with the little pig. After the leopard was gone with the baby, the mother went back to the herd and carried on as if nothing ever happened. She did not stand there and mourn her baby. After her baby was gone, it was like it never happened. This proved to me that animals do not have emotions like humans do. Because if that was a person and it's baby had been killed by a leopard, the mom would have been in mourning for days, and even years.

Vegans say animals feel just like humans do. That is untrue. Maybe dogs and cats do, but not pigs, cattle and chickens. Those animals are designed to live only in the moment. They do not reflect back on things that happened in their past. They don't look foreword to their future. They don't have hopes and dreams like people do. I'm not saying that because these animals don't have hopes and dreams that they don't deserve to live any more than we do. I'm just saying that we should not be made to feel guilty about eating them because vegans think these animals are emotionally on the same level as humans, when in fact they are not. Vegans call people like me hypocrites. Well, I call them ridiculous. I think some of them have been watching too many cartoons and reading too many children's books that put animals on the same level as humans.

I even hear vegans trashing zoos, when I've heard all my life that zoos do a lot of good for animals. Vegans call zoos "glorified prisons for animals". I can see them bashing circuses, I've never been to a circus in my life and I never intend to go to one. I know circuses abuse animals. I saw a story about that a long time ago on Hard Copy. I could not believe my eyes. But that was Hard Copy. That had nothing to do with like PETA, or any other animal-hippie activists. That's why even I bash circuses. But zoos, I've never heard of them doing bad. I have heard of some bad zoos, but most vegans get their ideas from PETA. One of my friends posted a pic of a polar bear in a zoo, and the pic was from PETA, and it was made to look like the bear was crammed in a small cage. I would not be surprised if PETA took that pic and made it look like it was in a cramped cage to get people to feel sorry for it. The compound it was in was probably huge. Most zoos I've been to house their animals quite appropriately. Though in some countries, like China, they treat animals far differently than we in the USA do. I would believe a polar bear would be in a cramped cage there. Not here though. Unless it was a private collection, where the owner doesn't know the standards of keeping an animal like that. The point is that groups like PETA and the HSUS and other animal activist groups don't tell you the whole truth. They only tell you what they want you to hear.

I told the people on this one thread that I thank GOD for animal breeding facilities. One person said if I want to see wild animals, then watch them on nature shows. Well, I usually do. I'm not downing nature shows. But it's one thing to see my favorite animals in nature shows, and another to see them in real life. I love watching lemurs race around with each other in real life, even if it is in cages. The sight of them is phenomenal! It's not like seeing them on TV. Besides, on nature shows, you're really at the mercy of the cameraman and editors. I once watched a nature show I thought was going to be about antelope. That's what the advertisement said! And what do they show more of? Panthers! Panthers chasing antelope. It SUCKED!!!! If I'd have wanted to see panthers, I would have watched a nature show promoting panthers! Which I usually don't do! When I am at a zoo, I don't even look at any of the panthers. Not even so much as a glance. I skip right past them, and go on to the next display. But I do thank GOD for captive breeding programs and zoos. Because I don't want to see lemurs disappear from the planet forever. It would be a sucky planet if they did.

Personally, I don't see zoos as being any more cruel than nursing homes, and that is what I told this person. That's how I see them. And I would wager you that animals in zoos are treated more kindly than a lot of people in nursing homes are treated. You see zoos with dolphins and killer whales doing tricks, well, dolphins and killer whales like to have their minds stimulated. It would be worse if they were in their tanks with nothing to do. There is a place, I cannot remember where it is, I think in Australia, but I saw it on TV the other night. The dolphins actually come into the lagoon to interact with people and do tricks, and they love it. The dolphins are free to come and go out into the ocean, but they choose not to, because they love doing tricks and interacting with the visitors. This tells me that PETA was wrong about imprisoning dolphins and "forcing" them to do tricks is wrong. One killer whale has an overabundance of testosterone, and kills a couple of trainers, and all of a sudden PETA is saying the killer whale was "getting even" with it's human captors for keeping him out of his home.

I don't deny that sometimes killer whales act out of anger. I once read an article where a bull killer whale attacked an adult male elephant seal for what the witnesses believed was no reason at all. Didn't eat the seal, just attacked and killed him. It's a terrible thing to watch, but it happens. I don't believe it was for no reason though. It could have been a territorial thing because the whale had his wife with him, and she didn't do any attacking on the seal. Anyway, this is why I refer to every argument the vegans have as to why we should all go vegan as being nothing but propaganda. Because that's all it is to me. They also say eating meat makes you fat. Well, that's not true either. My grandma's great aunt ate meat, every day of her life. Back in those days, you didn't have a meal without meat. She lived to be over 100 years old, and was healthy all the way. I think my grandma must have been the first vegan the world has ever known. When she was little, she never wanted to eat meat, or drink milk. All she ever wanted was rice, and baby lima beans. If she wanted a drink, she drank water. If she wanted a snack, she ate apples. But she experienced a lot of problems because of her diet. And even though she was never fat, she did suffer from pernicious anemia, which her doctor said was from not eating meat; and type 2 diabetes, even though the vegans say you cannot get diabetes if you are a vegan. Grandma was not born with either of these conditions. They came on gradually.

The vegans have argued with me that you cannot get pernicious anemia from not eating meat. But none of them are doctors, and probably have not yet experienced pernicious anemia in anyone before. My grandma got it, and that is good enough evidence for me. It's one of the biggest reasons why I refuse to go vegan. I still let the vegans have their way, they have a right to their beliefs and opinions. But when they argue with me that eating meat and drinking milk is not "personal choice", that it is "cruelty", sorry. I cannot see things the way they do. I see things my own way. The way nature intended.

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Small Dog Owners Are Always Fat

Really? Would those people say Marilyn Monroe is fat? I found this pic this morning on Facebook. It's a picture of a very fat Marilyn Monroe with her pet chihuahua.


Yes, she owned a chihuahua. And no, she doesn't look fat to me. In fact, most people would agree she was one of the most beautiful women that ever lived. Yet, she owned a chihuahua. So do a lot of other rather nice-looking people. Admittedly most of them are women. Very few men own chihuahuas on their own. Those that do are usually married to someone who loves chihuahuas. So I think this kinda kills the theory that only fat people own small dogs.

But now, let's look at the other side of the picture, I can put my fingers on a dozen fat people, that I know personally, who own labradors, or golden retrievers, and even great danes. The weight of a person does not determine the size of the dog. I think the weight is more like a side-effect of our nation's current conditions of what's going into our food. Not the size of the dog they own. I will say I've seen more fat (and ugly) cat-owners than small dog owners. Of course I am fat and ugly too, and I don't have a cat. I do have 2 tiny dogs. But I am just one person. Every time I see someone say that everyone who owns small dogs is fat, lazy and ignorant, I shake my head. Because it is so not true! Then they go on to say that everyone who owns big dogs is fit, healthy and more intelligent. Again, I shake my head. The people who say that stuff is usually crazy, and not in a cute way.

I don't know, any kind of stereotyping makes any person look bad. Though I say I've seen more people who were fat and ugly owning cats, I don't make that the basis of how I see cat owners. I try to look at each person as an individual. I've known some very intelligent cat owners. Since cats do tend to make people crazy, I would also venture to say it's cat owners that are the most creative (Dougal Dixon is a cat owner, and he is the father of speculative biology). Same with small dogs. Judging a person by the size of dog they own to me is just simple ridiculousness! And it's an excuse morons use to judge another person that apparently no one else will defend, just so they can be judging that other person. Judgmental people just have WAY too much time on their hands. It's silly!

I remember back in Bozeman, Karen said Helga, when she was younger, looked almost identical to Marilyn Monroe. I dunno. I would have been able to tell the difference. Marilyn Monroe loved animals. Helga hates animals. There is no similarity there at all. Helga was just nuts. I don't like her. When I was a kid, and up into my teenage years, I hated people that didn't like animals. Now, it really makes no difference. As long as they are not abusive towards animals, they can love or hate them, I don't care. I even have friends now that are not animal lovers in any way, shape or form.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

UMG Plus More!

Well, I got the UMG Productions site up and running again, and a few more stories have been added. A couple I had to do some clean-up on, but I finished the site. I found a platform, Sellfy.com and am using that for digital sales. Actually the money for those goes to my supervisor. Not me. Some of the stories I put up are up on the site for the very first time. They are as follows:

A Tribute to Mount St. Helens

To Work or Dress

Futuristic Fight-Club

The Twister (yes, I worked out the slip-ups)

The Pendant

The Lemur and the Mouse

Adventures In Moving

I am also working on more stories. Right now, I am heavily engrossed on another St. Helens story. This one is St. Helens, 100 years from now. Well, from the year 2000, when the story was first written. That will be the next story to be put up on the site. It's a good story, IMO. About a Dyscampturus lemur (again, from Metazoica. Modern animals are boring to write about) female and cub, who live on the mountain. Mount St. Helens erupts again, and the mom is taken away. The cub is left behind and is rescued. At the rehabilitation center, he is bandaged up and meets another cub, a female, who also lost her mom in the eruption. But she is something of a bully. Well, I don't want to give the story away too much. It'll be available on the site soon.

Ya know with all these putting old stories together, and sometimes even tweaking them a little, I never have time anymore to write new stories. Just rehashing old stories. But I want them to look perfect for their debut on the site. If I am going to offer any story on the site, it's going to be one that I am proud of. Some stories I have on the site just for the hell of it. Some I wrote just to get everything out of my system! I put them in book form so that hopefully other people can learn something from them. A great example is Adventures In Moving. Most of that story is about the time I lived with Patti, the evil roommate (and check out the picture I made of her in the article). That pic is NO exaggeration! That is what Patti really looked like! Now that I am no longer living with her, the pupils in her eyes must have relaxed again, now that she can shoot up her street drugs again. She couldn't do that when I was living with her. But anyway, that was what I saw that third night in the kitchen, when she would not let me go back into my bedroom.

Another such story is Hutchess (A Picture Diary). The story really has no point to it. I am only offering it on the site because I am hoping it gives comfort to someone else who has lost a pet before. I once had a similar story, only less pictures and more story, I put up on lulu after I lost Groucho. But I don't offer that one on the UMG Productions site. It's just something I slapped together. But the story about Hutchess is more of a story. It has funny little happenings throughout the story, and goes into detail about what happened to her. And also what happened to me after I lost her. Like the strange dreams I had. Those were the worst!

Well, I also still have the INXS story, but only as an ebook. Ya know I went to the inxs.com site yesterday, and I noticed they have a tab on their online store for ebooks. But NO WAY am I offering this ebook on the site!! If INXS ever finds out I wrote a story with them in it, I could be in trouble. I hope to GOD they never find out about that story! One of the good things about them not looking into my website. But I still think that story needs some more tweaking. It took me 7 years to write that story. It'd be a shame if INXS asked me to take it down. One of the reasons it took me so long was because I am notoriously bad at endings! I still don't think I should have ended that story with Michael's death. But my friend who helped me write it said it's good. It should set the stage for a number of other continuing stories. IF I ever get around to writing them. HA!

Well, that's about all I have to say. Check out the UMG Productions site! It's better! This time, the ebooks are staying! No more dealing with PayLoadz!!