Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by sheer honesty, or you think me having my own opinions is "being negative", then this is not the place for you, and I suggest you leave and head elsewhere. I call a spade a spade, and I don't sugarcoat anything.

Monday, December 2, 2013

Batman Fan Till The End

Hey, I admit it, I am a Batman fan. Always have been. Well, ever since I first saw the Batman movie from 1989. I loved it. My first boyfriend took me to see that movie and even bought me a hot dog. I had fun that day, like I always had with him. Those of us who are fans love Batman, he's not like Superman, he has no super powers. He doesn't have x-ray vision built in. He doesn't zap his enemies with a laser beam. He just has strength and wit. I even used to have some Batman collectibles, and comics a mile high. I recently found the first Batman comic book for $1. Back when I was collecting his comics, I heard one would have to shell out $80,000 to buy that one. But I once saw it on ebay for $1! I should have got it! It would have been awesome if I had! But at that price, it was probably in very bad condition. Batman has always been a source of inspiration to me, he's even inspired me to create my own versions of Batman stories, using UMG characters instead of people. They are just crazy enough to be entertaining, and some of the best and funniest stories I've ever written.

Also, did you ever notice how when any Batman movie is made, Robin becomes the teenage heartthrob? The girls always love him. LOL! There's something about him. But for me, Batman was my hero. I like Robin too, but Batman is the living end for me. Or whatever the hell the kids these days are saying. Also, I'd like to focus on what makes Batman so irresistible to me. It isn't his strength, or mysterious character. It isn't his looks and thinking about what such a man would look like if I were to see him in person. It isn't his wit. The one thing that makes Batman so irresistible to me is the colorful menagerie of villains he always battles. I want to talk about some of my favorites on here, and why I like them. I have several favorites among Batman's foes. The reasons I like them differ quite a bit. But most of the reasons are ones that I can relate to.

Everyone knows and likes the Joker. He somewhat defines Batman as a super hero. And let's face it, whenever a movie with Batman battling the Joker comes out, it is hugely successful. The Joker was Batman's first foe, he was there at the beginning, and he'll be there until Batman's comics are no longer kept alive. I like the Joker because he is so insane he's funny. Kindof like me. Only I don't want to kill anyone. The Joker is so well-liked, he even now has his own comic book, devoted entirely to him. There is a song, an old song, and I have it on my MP3 player, and my ipod. It's called Queen of Hearts by Julie Newman I think is her name. Anyway, there is a part in that song that goes "The joker ain't the only fool" and every time I hear that line, it makes me think of the Joker and Batman dancing to this tune. LOL!! Told you all I was a little bit crazy!

Mr. Freeze is another one of my favorite villains. The reason I like him is because I can really relate to him in so many ways. He became dependant on the cold after his wife passed away, it was his way of coping with the loss. When I lost my Groucho, I became the same way. Well, maybe not so much dependant on the cold, but I dealt with her loss in just as bizarre a way. My first reaction to such a major loss was most of my voluntary functions slow down, and I spent a lot of time sleeping. I didn't want to eat or drink anything, I didn't want to go on walks, I didn't want to listen to music, or watch TV. All I wanted to do was sleep. Ya know, pretty much the same thing happens when I get into any traumatic situation. I became the same way when I moved in with Patti. It was supposed to be a happy time, and I kept telling myself it would be. But I was going into something new with someone I didn't know at all. I'd never had a roommate before, outside of family. And to suddenly become a roommate with someone I had never met before, and who was crazier than I was, it was traumatic.

Two-Face is another villain that I really love. For pretty much the same reason I like Mr. Freeze. He was once a handsome person, who became deformed after an accident. It brought out trauma that had been happening in his life. Same with me. I used to be gorgeous. Look at me now. I am an ugly, pathetic shell of my former self. It's brought out the worst in me. And I think people treating me like shit because they think I am ugly too has made me an angry, bitter old bitch. But sometimes I take it with a grain of salt. I mean, I know I am ugly, but I also know I cannot do anything about it. I just have to live with it. But I didn't become ugly after an accident. It was some meds I was on that made me get fat, grow hair, and become ugly. And when I say grow hair, I mean in the wrong places. It took hair from the places I wanted it, and put it in places I didn't want it.

The Riddler is another villain I always liked. In fact, he was always my favorite. I liked him even better than the Joker. Actually, I think it could be a tie between the Riddler and Two-Face. Writing a story with Batman battling the Riddler was quite a challenge for me, and I loved it! The Riddler is witty and funny and he gives clues to his crimes in his riddles, but you never really know what he's going to do. That's why I find him more fascinating than any of Batman's other villains. I used to have tons of comics of Batman battling the Riddler. They made up the majority of my collection. When I get my own home, I'm going to paint my bedroom wall green with question marks all over it. I'd love that! Then I am going to do all my videos that I put up on YouTube in that room. Just because. I can't relate to the Riddler, I am not that smart. But I am devoted to him because he has a unique character.

You would think as much as I like the Riddler and Two-Face, I would have loved Batman Forever. But no, I didn't like it all that much. It was funny and I loved Tommy Lee Jones as Two-Face. But the Riddler himself kinda bothered me. He had all this Riddler memorabilia before the Riddler was supposed to even exist! That didn't make sense to me. It's like me having pictures of Vegas that were taken before we even got Odessa, his mom. The memorabilia should not have been put into the movie until after the Riddler character was created! There's a scene where Jim Carrey (or Edward Nygma) was on the computer trying to come up with a persona for himself, surrounded again by all the Riddler memorabilia. And every time I see that scene, I think to myself "Jesus, just look around you! It's already all there!"

The Mad Hatter is one of my minor faves among Batman's villains. He is not really given his due credit, or immortalized as much as the others I've mentioned. But I do like him. I've written 2 stories of Batman battling the Mad Hatter. The reason being is because I have Uncle Martin himself portraying a role as the Mad Hatter. But he's never given much airtime. I mean, he rarely made an appearance on the animated series. There's never been a Batman movie with him in it. Yet, I think of him enough to write 2 stories of Batman battling the Mad Hatter. Even though it's not the familiar comic book character himself. I had a couple of comics in my collection of Batman against the Mad Hatter. But actually, those were created few and far between. I am hoping to someday see a movie devoted entirely to Batman battling the Mad Hatter. That would be great! And it would be a change of pace.

Now, some Batman characters that I don't like very well are the Penguin and Catwoman. Catwoman is very popular, but to me, she's nothing but a cat-fag. I don't like cat-fags. The Penguin, well, I do like penguins, and birds in general. But the Penguin is kinda dumb and delirious. I never seem to get into any comics or motion pictures solely with him in it. Though it's not so bad if he makes an appearance with other villains that I do like. But I like him better than Catwoman.