I Found Out!

I totally found out this morning who the "person" was that left that nasty message on my sister's door. I cannot tell Anna who it was, but I heard who is responsible for it through the grapevine. This person apparently told Roger that (s)he was going to do it, and Roger told Lois. No one wants Anna to know because they feel she'll open up another can of worms. But when it was told to me, I was shocked! Yesterday, when Karen, Kim and I were talking about it, I said to Karen that I hope the culprit is not another fat-ass themselves. Karen almost died laughing. Well, guess what! It is another fat-ass! In fact, the person is a LOT fatter (and uglier) than Anna is, and I could not tell Anna who it was, but I told her to take comfort in the fact that the person who made that sign is MUCH fatter than she is! It's not at all any of the people I thought it was, but definitely someone I didn't like at all. And now I hate that person even MORE because that dumbass made me blame an innocent man and say things in a letter that I would never normally say to anyone! Including not signing my name to the letter! I'm not like that, that made me feel like a coward, and I hate that feeling!

I'm not normally a people-person, but the person who did this to Anna, I never liked him/her from the very first time I saw them. There was something about this person that just bothered me from the start. Now I know what it was! Am I a great judge of character or what??!! HA!! I remember Karen one time wanted me to get in the elevator with this person (LONG before the note incident), and I refused to do it! But she made me anyway! I hated it! It gave me goosebumps and made my skin crawl just being in the elevator with this person. I'll tell you, I don't like this person at all!! The fact that the culprit is a fat-ass themself, and a coward, it almost made me just burst out laughing! Well, that and the fact that I sensed there was something evil about this person from day 1. It's like "hey pot! Meet kettle!" and "she's black!" But this person is FAT, ugly, and I never see them out going on long walks either, so is very lazy as well! MUCH lazier than Anna!

I told Anna that I would tell her someday, perhaps after she moves out of here. But I just cannot tell her now. Either I will tell her in an e-mail, or a letter, over the phone, or on this blog, but one way or another, some day I will tell her. I just cannot tell her as long as she is living in this complex, because I don't want her to cause a ruckus over it. By that time, I'll probably be living on the coast. But I know Anna reads this blog, so she'll get the message.

Well, It's All Done

Well, I thought I would write an update. I apologized to Roger. Anna and I went downstairs and he was there waiting for the mail to arrive. I asked to see him, and he asked me what for, and I told him it was something very important, and I didn't want to say it in front of the other people sitting there. So we went outside. I told him that I was the person who posted the hateful message on his door, and I apologized most sincerely. I thought he was going to rant and rage and call me every name in the book. But he didn't. He took it surprisingly calmly, and said he accepted my apology. Believe me when I say I felt like shit after I found out the truth. But I must also correct something else too. Actually 2 things:

1. Lois told me that the note left on Anna's door said "you're a fat, lazy mutt. Why don't you go move to the dog pound!?" I didn't know someone had referred to Anna as a "mutt". She didn't tell me that! That could mean it's anybody. If the person had called Anna a bitch, that would have been one thing. Mostly men are the ones who call women bitches like that. But a "mutt" could have been anybody, man or woman. Besides the fact that that sounds incredibly stupid! It's the first time I've ever seen anyone call someone a "mutt"! LOL! I wish someone would call me a "mutt". I like dogs. I wouldn't mind.

2. That the culprit could not have been the woman I said earlier was fatter than me and Anna. That woman even gave us a Christmas card last year. Somehow I didn't think it really was, seeing as she's fat herself. But it could have been done to throw us off the scent.

Lois knows who the culprit is, but she is not saying. She did say it's someone who is old, but immature, and thinks they're perfect. And it has to be someone who is on this floor, and most likely down that hallway. And they are a coward! Even Lois agrees the person is a coward. So unlike what Karen said this morning, the person does not "pack a punch", unless they are talking anonymously behind closed doors. But anyone can do that! It doesn't take a tough person to do that at all. At least I can say neither Anna nor I are cowards! I actually confessed to Roger that I wrote the note on his door. That is what a mature person does, who is not afraid of taking responsibility for their actions. When I am wrong, I am wrong, and I admit it. I have no problem admitting it. One thing I can never truthfully be accused of is being irresponsible. But a coward, in my eyes, is the same as being on the level of irresponsible, and there is nothing I hate more than irresponsible people!


Well, the one person on this floor that I believe thinks she's perfect is Betty Warwood. Like I said in several previous posts (here and on in prizon), she's stuck-up! And she had just returned from some trip the day before. She is one of my top 2 suspects right now. It's a toss-up between her and Dan, the ugly dude. I don't even talk to Betty anymore. Not since that last time I thought she was talking to me and she wasn't. But she walks around here like she believes she's perfect. Sometimes she still talks to me and looks at me, even though I don't want her to!! But this person who, like a cowardly little bitch, left that note on Anna's door, I hate him (or her)! I don't care who this person is, or who their friends are, I hate him (or her) anyway. Not just because of the note they left on Anna's door, but also because they made me accuse an innocent man of the crime! If I find out who it is, I'll scratch their eyes out! Irresponsible people make me SICK!!!

Feeling Like Shit!

Well, this morning I feel like shit. I was at the dog park with our buddies, Karen and Kim. Anna was not there. After Andy and Mike left, Karen started talking to me about the note I left on Roger's door, and said that Lois is PISSED!!!! She said Lois was one pissed off woman. But she blamed Anna for the note. I promised myself that if Anna got blamed for that note that I would completely confess to writing it. Karen told me that Lois knows who the culprit is, and it's NOT Roger. When Karen told me he didn't write that letter to Anna and said that Lois knows exactly who it is, I really felt like shit! I got this lump in the pit of my belly. I said to Karen that I have a confession to make. Karen knew right away what I was going to say. She said "You did it!" I said "yes." I said that Anna had nothing to do with that letter. I feel just awful!! I said some shitty things in that letter. Calling Roger things like "retarded" and "spineless". Now I feel I have to explain everything to Lois, and apologize to Roger. I feel like shit! Poor Roger he got the worst end of the deal, and he didn't even have any idea what it was all about. Karen began making pranks about the whole deal after I confessed, but even her jokes could not cheer me up. I just feel like shit! I don't even care that this whole issue is ruined now, I feel bad because I thought Roger did it, and I blamed him for it.

What else was I supposed to think??? After this shopping cart war going on! And Roger saying the note on Anna's door was stupid, I figured he'd stoop that low as to put a message like that on Anna's door. I was just sticking up for Anna, I thought I could by giving him a taste of his own medicine. Or so I thought that's what I was doing. I said if Roger did not do it, then it must have been Andy. But Karen said that Andy does not have a computer or a printer. Besides, he would have used the word "cow", not "bitch". But he has called Anna a fat bitch before. I heard him. Kim spoke up and said that it's most likely the last person you'd expect, and I thought about that actually last night. I said to Karen and Kim that all I can hope is that the person who wrote it is not a fat-ass themselves. Kim said it could be someone who is usually quiet, but can pack a punch. I don't know about the "pack a punch", but the one person I know of on this floor who is quiet, and always gives me dirty looks is a woman who is MUCH fatter than either me or Anna! I saw her yesterday morning smoking a cigarette out front. She seems to be quiet, and she always looks depressed. As far as I know, she only talks to a few people here. She does not seem to have many friends here herself, and she's a lot fatter than Anna is! She's even fatter than me! Why would she call Anna fat names when she's even fatter than the both of us?

Then there is this guy Dan, I call him "that ugly dude", because he always looks so mean and ugly. I figured from day 1 that he could even be the one pushing the shopping carts in front of Anna's door. Karen said he doesn't have a mean bone in his body, but I always figure that to be wrong, because he always looks so mean. He's also quiet, and seems to have a problem with me and Anna. Of course I always call him "the ugly dude", and I swear sometimes he hears me say it. LOL! But Anna never says it. And Dan himself is fat, at least as fat as Anna. Though I don't think he's lazy. Dan kinda looks like Paul Casler from back in WA, who always gave me and Anna trouble since we were kids. His mom was a whore. Really! She was! Everyone in the neighborhood knew his mom spent her nights downtown, prostituting. Paul, and both his sisters all had different fathers. Neither one of them had the same daddy. Dan, besides always having that ugly look on his face, is quite ugly physically himself. I just never have anything to do with him. He looks too mean. So I stay away from him. And I like it a lot better when he keeps away from me.

But still I feel like shit! I'm going to tell Lois I wrote the letter, and then I have to apologize to Roger. And I will. He's going to be pissed off too. Well, I wouldn't blame him if he did! I deserve anything he can ever say about me. That's how low I feel! I just feel effed right now!

Sis's Attitude

I am hoping Anna does see this. A lot of people have been complaining about her attitude. I know Anna has an attitude problem, I've known that for years. I guess you could say I've gotten used to it. I hate it when Anna responds to everything with an attitude. When we were in Idaho Falls, we went to Sam's Club, and the guy who greets people at the door, we were talking to him, and whenever Anna spoke, she did it with a lot of attitude in her voice. I was so embarrassed! Anna just never smiles when she talks. So I guess with her, talking must seem like a chore, and her tones seem to change. I thought maybe she was tired that day, because she had such an attitude in her voice. And the poor doorman, he looked at her like he wanted her away from him right then. I felt so bad about that! I wanted to apologize to that man on behalf of Anna, because I don't know if Anna knew she had such a rude tone in her voice!

That's not the first or only time Anna has had a bad attitude. She's been fired from jobs because when she gets frustrated, she cops an attitude with everyone. I don't know if she even knows she's doing it. I heard about the incident when she worked at Target back in 2006. Someone threw away some soup that Anna took to work to have at lunch time. Apparently that was their day to clean up completely, but Anna said they didn't have a sign anywhere stating that on that day, all things in the refrigerator would be cleared out and thrown away. Well, when Anna found her soup missing, and someone told her it had been thrown away, Anna threw a fit. She told me she kicked the chairs around and pounded on the tables. Well, someone reported Anna's little shit-fit to the manager and Anna got fired. I hated it that she did that, but that's how she handles things, by getting all pissed off and throwing fits. It's wrong, and Anna needs to work on that. Last week, Anna got a message that a local grocery store that she has been doing demos at, does not want her to work there anymore. They said she got pushy and rude when she could not find her demo table. I didn't see it, as I was not in the room when she talked to them. I don't know what happened, but I know Anna very well, and based on what I saw at the Sam's Club in Idaho Falls, there was little doubt in my mind that Anna did lose her temper and got pushy. Anna asked me that day if she really is like that, and I had to say yes.

And it isn't just at work. She loses her temper around here too. Remember the story of Raymie? Apparently she said something about Odessa, though I am not sure she really meant it for Odessa. But Anna got so pissed off that she told Raymie if she ever touched Odessa, that Anna was going to do something terrible to her. I really wish Anna hadn't said that!!! It's one thing to stick up for Odessa. But what Anna did was threaten to harm this woman. And Raymie could not do anything to Odessa! She could barely walk! Let alone break a tiny dog's neck, like she said. I sure would not have handled it that way! Instead, I would have put the ball in Raymie's court and left it there. I would have asked Raymie how she would like it if someone threatened to break her kids' (or grandkids') necks. I'd never do that, but Odessa is Anna's kid. So in her eyes, it would have been the same thing. And Andy teases Anna all the time. The only reason he does it is because he knows she will always respond to him! And she does! She needs to stop it. I always hate it when Anna responds because she develops an attitude toward others, and it is by that that everyone here judges her by.

Anna was like that even before we moved here. I remember one day we went to Point Defiance park, and we were both walking down the pier. A couple of 10-year old boys on bikes were causing some trouble for the people on the pier that day. When they got to us, they pretended like they were going to run over us, but stopped short of doing it. I didn't even pay them any attention. I just walked around their bikes and kept on walking. But Anna just had to give them this evil glare of her's! If she had just ignored them, my plan would have gone perfectly. I heard one of the boys shout "What are you looking at?!!" and go on with name-calling, which I did not pay any attention to. I don't even know who that kid was talking to. There were so many people on that pier, and from what I saw, they had been causing trouble for all of them, which is why I chose to ignore them. But Anna shouted back at them, and I wish she hadn't!! But being Anna, she just had to ruin the morning by giving those kids the response they were after! Anna shouted "The same to you! Ugly dudes!" Then one of those boys shouted "Shut up, fatso!" Luckily for them, they were not my kids! I'd have slapped them! But no doubt their parents never heard about them going around being disrespectful to adults, and causing problems all over the pier. Or if they did know about it, they must have been some bad parents, and I mean BAD parents!! I often have to wonder what kind of people raise kids like that. Probably they don't. My guess is the kids more likely are the ones raising the parents, and telling the parents what to do. It's a sad day when little kids are the ones bossing their parents around, and people wonder why America is going to Hell. But still, Anna should have just done like I did. In the back of my mind, I say "fuck them!" And I refused to give them the attention they were craving.

I don't know why for some reason, Anna always thinks she has to respond to bullshitters! I tell her not to do that, but she does it anyway, and it makes her look bad all the time! Even our friend Karen said she does not like Anna's attitude. Anna is a nice person, but I really wish she would just learn to let things go! I do. I don't cop an attitude when someone is bullshitting me. I get hateful comments all the time, I never get pissed off at any of them. Like tonight, this guy on youtube, who calls himself music22727358, he thought he was going to piss me off by continuing to call me "fat bitch" as if it were my name (although that is what I say in my YouTube profile page), and saying shit about fat people in general. But no. I didn't even feel the slightest bit pissed off. In fact, I laughed at him! His spelling was reminiscent of a 6-year old child, even though he claims in his profile that he is 26. I doubt it though! LOL! I told him to contact me again when he learns how to spell like an actual 26 year old person, then MAYBE, I will probably take him a little bit more seriously. Probably. But not likely. LOL! But see, I did not give him the kind of response he was hoping to get from me, and I feel wonderful! I had a big grin on my face all night because I was so proud I kept my cool with that bozo. Besides, he's from the UK. What should one expect from them? Anna could learn a lot by watching my responses, or sometimes the lack of such. Although I did like Anna's responses to the idiots on my I Hate Montana video, which I still have yet to see that first donation from those "campaigning to get all idiots out of Montana". Like I said, he should begin with himself, not me. LOL!

The Confession

I was downstairs a little while ago and I ran into Deb, she apparently had a talk with Roger. She told me that Roger swears he didn't write that note. Frankly, I don't buy it! He also swore to Anna that he wasn't the one who has been leaving the shopping carts in front of her door, but then in the next breath he turned around and basically admitted that he was. And he even openly admitted he is the culprit to at least 5 other people. If Roger did not do it (and I am not saying he didn't), it could only have been one other person who would say something like that to Anna, and that is Andy. But the thing is, I have no idea if Andy even has a computer or a printer. And why would he come all the way up to this floor just to post a sickening letter like that on Anna's door?? Especially since he promised Karen he was going to try and be nicer to us. Unless he just simply snapped, which is what usually happens with him, now that he's on this new medication.

Well, if I am wrong, and Roger didn't do it, I'm going to feel awful. But if it's true that Andy did do it, I'll be somewhat relieved. Because I think Anna should be used to Andy's teasing by now. I know I am. But I do remember he was at the dog park yesterday when I went in, and he simply left without another word, rather quickly. I mean, quicker than it usually takes him to leave. He just rushed out of there. Maybe it was a signal that he did something really wrong. I thought nothing of it at the time because he has always left when I walk into the park. But never as quickly as he did yesterday. But I'll still feel like shit because I accused Roger! What else could I think? He and Anna have been at this shopping cart war for quite a while now, and he's pissed off because of that sign on Anna's door, it seemed only logical he did do it. I still believe he did it. Until someone else steps up and actually admits they did it, I'll always believe Roger was the one who did it.

Roger has a few dim-wits on his side. Betty for one person. She also could have done it. Anna and I were just talking yesterday about how she has never bothered her. I don't know. I don't exactly like Betty. She's stuck-up and she's LOUD!!! Her voice is just naturally loud! Sometimes I want to stick a load of cotton in her throat just to get her to quiet down! But I don't like her. I also know she is always on Roger's side.

Cat And Mouse Games

Sometimes, I just want to slap the shit out of my sis's neighbor. It's this man named Roger, and he's an old man. Not like he's a young teenager or anything. He's been pushing carts in front of my sister's door. Anna had no idea who has been putting carts in front of her door, but she wrote a message and put it up on her door, telling the person to stop it. And she said the person who is doing it is stupid, dumb and inconsiderate. The note was not directed at any one person, just the person who has been pushing the cart in front of her door. Well, one day Roger was downstairs and he had been talking to Deb, Deb didn't think it was a good idea for Anna to have that sign on her door, calling someone dumb, stupid and inconsiderate. But Anna did not direct those comments to anyone in particular. But Roger complained about it (I know he did). The way he talked at Anna that day, and some things he said when she asked about the cart in front of her door, it gave him away as the culprit.

One morning Anna was walking out of her apartment with Odessa, and she saw Roger talking to someone and he mentioned out loud in front of her that she still has "that stupid sign" on her door. Basically, Roger has all but admitted to her that he was the culprit. But he has admitted it to several other people whom he waits downstairs for the mail man with. But he is so spineless, he absolutely refuses to admit it to Anna. Well, this morning Anna was again about to put Odessa out when she noticed an anonymous note on her door that said "You are a fat, lazy bitch, nobody likes you, your attitude anyway, so why don't you just move!" Anna took the note, gave it to Karen and asked her to give it to Lois. This has become an issue now. I knew when Anna told me about the message that it had to be Roger! I told her he's just trying to get to her because of that note on her door saying the shopping cart nag is dumb, stupid and inconsiderate. But it looks like now Roger wants to play games with Anna. So, I said if he wants to play this game with Anna, we're game! He'll have to deal with me too!

Well, I invited Anna to my apartment and I wrote a scathing letter back to him. I wrote "A stupid, retarded old fart lives here. He is loony, spineless, and needs to be institutionalized!" and I took it and stuck it on his door. I put it over his peephole, so I know he'd see it when he steps out. He didn't even see me post the sign on his door! LOL! I'll tell him I did it only after he tries to accuse Anna of doing it. But like I said, if he wants to play this way, we're game. Anna has me on her side! So it's our 2 brains against his none. Everyone here knows Roger is a loony old fart. Anna never did anything wrong to him either. But he just pushes any shopping carts he sees in the hallway in front of her door. He's just being an asshole. Irma, who is Anna's other neighbor, said Roger is acting like this because he believes Anna's apartment is possessed by some evil spirit or something. The guy who lived there before her used to give Roger a hard time, and I think he believes Anna is in some way connected with the former tenant. But that's wrong to put that kind of hatred and blame on Anna's shoulders. But it shows Roger completely lacks character!

He's lucky I don't believe in slapping an old man! LOL! I used to get slapped for shit-talking men that age! But I think even my dear, sweet mom would agree with me on this one. Roger's note has been turned in to the landlord. Bet anything he still doesn't admit he made that letter. The only other person who could have done it would have been Andy, and he never has had any reason to come to this floor so far. The only person who has such a problem with Anna that lives on this level is indeed Roger, and he was pissed off by that message Anna posted on her door. He could only be this upset if he were guilty, and more and more every day, he proves that he is. Deb says we need to have cameras placed down that hall! I agree! Either they do it, or I'll put a hidden camera up there. Hopefully Anna never gets another letter like that again on her door, but she should be prepared, this may get worse. But like I said, she has me on her side. But at least now I know why Roger won't just confront Anna face to face like an adult. But it's still not right, what he's doing. I told Anna if she gets another letter like that one, to show it to me as well. I want to see it.

Well, I knew the "retarded" epitaph would get to Roger! LOL! For someone as crazy as him, the word "retarded" always cuts them deeply. I was out in the lobby, and I saw him march himself down the hallway, and he had the note I left on his door wrapped around his wallet. He looked PISSED!!!! LOL! I just laughed, after he left of course. I'm not yet ready for him to know that I was the one who posted that letter anonymously. I'll tell him when he accuses Anna of doing it, which should not take too long. I just want to see if he actually does accuse her. Then that will provide a little further proof that he was the one who posted that stupid message on Anna's door.

The Past Loves of Timmyfan

Lately, I have been watching a lot of Gilligan's Island, basically trying to recapture my youth, and Netflix is helping me out here. I am getting some of the sitcoms I always enjoyed growing up. Gilligan's Island was one of them. And back then, I developed a huge kiddie crush on Bob Denver! I thought he was so cute! Ya know they say girls are often attracted to men who remind them of their father, whether consciously or unconsciously. For me, it must have been an unconscious attraction, because looking at him now, he does sort of remind me a little bit of how my father looked back then. I remember in my 6th grade class room, all my friends all talked about how ugly Bob Denver was in front of me. They usually said things to the effect of "Bob Denver? EWWW!!!" They were free to believe what they wanted, for some reason it didn't bother me. I guess I knew even back then that most people do not think screwball actors are cute or handsome. Bob Denver often portrayed someone who was screwy and dim-witted, like Gilligan. And a lot of people usually do not find that attractive. But in all honesty, you take away the sailor's hat and don't think of him as a dim-witted second mate marooned on a deserted island, Bob Denver was actually quite handsome!

Those were pics of him as a young man. He has a certain amount of charm in these pics! That was how I saw him. I thought he was handsome, and I did think so for a long time. Actually, it was a toss-up between him and the professor. I found that most of my friends who watched the show liked the professor more. Probably again because usually he was serious and intelligent, more so than anyone else on the show. One of my buddies back then said she thought Ginger was the only good-looking cast member. But Ginger was a girl! And this friend was a girl. I didn't think anything about it back then, but I couldn't have a crush on Ginger! LOL! People would have thought I was gay. Well! I think they thought I was gay anyway. Because there was this boy named Paul Rades, who I believe went around and told everyone in the whole school I was gay! LOL! In recently thinking about this, I believe that is why there were people I'd never known and never did any harm to in that school that hated my guts so much! Paul must have went around and told everyone I was gay! Back then, gay people were severely lynched. But I loved Bob Denver! To say I was gay would have been like saying a horse is a breed of dog.

Ahh! That's what I hated so much about that place! Ya know they say everyone has 'layers'. That is, there is an outer person that everyone sees, then there is a person underneath that outer person that no one usually sees. Kids usually judge other people by their outer layers. But these kids didn't even judge me by that! They just heard what someone else thought I was, and believed it. Kids are so dumb sometimes!

Well, I guess you might call me a "celebrity slut" because at about the same time I had taken on a crush for Bob Denver, I had already found another love, Harpo Marx. My devotion for him led to a complete and utter love for the Marx Brothers. But Harpo was definitely the cutest. But again, all my friends kept trying to convince me that they were ugly. I didn't see them that way, especially not Harpo! One friend I had even went so far as to try and convince me that they were "dogs". Well, I liked dogs! She could not insult me by saying the Marx Brothers were dogs. I didn't think the Marx Brothers were as ugly as those people were trying to convince me they were. I mean, how could you say this face is ugly??

Harpo was known for his angelic expression. If you think that's ugly, there's something wrong with you! If you were to compare Harpo with a dog, I think he'd be either a chihuahua or maybe a maltese, something adorable like that. And I mean a well-bred chihuahua, not those ugly Taco Bell dog lookalikes that are common among poor-quality breeders. Something more like a breed with a very baby-doll-like face. Here's another interesting fact I learned when I was reading Harpo's autobiography, Harpo Speaks. I heard he used to spend some time in the summer at Ocean Shores! To think, if I had lived there in the 30s and 40s, I possibly could have met him! That would have been cool!

Ever wonder what he looked like without the make-up? Like an average man. Here's a pic of him with his wife, who was also an actress and starred in Million-Dollar Legs:

Yes, Harpo was a dog-lover! Most decent people are. :) There's a story behind this little dog in the picture too, and he mentions it in his autobiography as well. It's a good book! I suggest it to anyone who has ever enjoyed the Marx Brothers. Well, my love for the Marx Brothers outlasted my affliction for Bob Denver. I mean, I still bore a torch for him, but it shrinked to the size of a hand-held lighter by the time I was in middle school.

During my  Middle school years, my affection for the Marx Brothers began to wane, and any affection I felt for Bob Denver had all but disappeared. That was because I discovered 2 new TV shows. I used to love old movies and TV shows. They don't make them like that anymore. But what was once KTZZ channel 22 used to have a Golden Oldies hour, and during that hour they ran Dennis the Menace and My Favorite Martian. They both quickly became my favorite shows, especially My Favorite Martian. I mean, I liked Dennis the Menace, but I didn't see it anywhere near as being in the same class as My Favorite Martian! For one reason, and ONLY one reason. I had a huge crush on both the stars of the show, Ray Walston and Bill Bixby. I thought both were very good-looking men!

Ray Walston was older than my grandma, but I always thought he was just as cute as a button! I remember when I was in middle school, no one said he was ugly, but everyone kept trying to convince me that he was dead! LOL! I kept telling them he wasn't, because I knew better. One boy named David Grant, even got pissed off at me because I said he wasn't dead, and he said in a hateful tone "Yes he IS! GOD-Dammit!" I don't know what his problem was, or why he got so rude just because Ray Walston was not dead. If men ever got PMS, I would have said maybe that day he was PMSing! LOL! This was back in the mid to late 80s! Ray Walston was very much alive then, and even had starred in a new TV series called Fast Times. Ray Walston did not die until the beginning of 2001. Oddly enough, it was the same year my grandma died too. But to this day, he still has a place of his own in my heart! I can never let go of the time I had deep feelings for him, and the fun and laughter he brought me. And that face! That adorable face!

I dunno. I had a big thing for older men back then! To me, older men looked much more distinguished than younger men. Especially the boys in my school. And then there was Bill Bixby. Now, he was another story. Most people remember him as the Incredible Hulk and from The Courtship of Eddie's Father. I used to watch both shows, but to me, Bill Bixby will always be Tim O'hara. Another reason I learned to love the show so much is because of the name of the main characters, it was the same as that of a friend of mine that I had before, who had passed away. The thing about Bill Bixby was he was younger and more good looking. Ray Walston was just cute. Bill Bixby was really handsome! And for a change, none of my friends kept saying he was ugly.

I feel sorry for Bill Bixby. His one and only child ever died when he was only 6 of a severe throat infection. After that, he never had anymore kids. So there is nothing left of him. I remember when I was a teenager, and had a crush on him, I had written letters to different celebs, asking them if they'd like to do a photo-exchange. I wrote to Bill Bixby. I was going to write to Ray Walston, but I wrote to Bixby first and waited to see if I would hear back from him. THEN, I was going to write to Ray Walston. But Bill Bixby never answered me back, so I guess I got a little discouraged and didn't write to Ray Walston. Not even so much as a "thank you" letter from Bixby. But I guess now I know why. He was having a hard time that year, as I believe that was the year his kid died. I also remember writing to Bob Hope and Red Skelton, and I heard back from both of them. Bob Hope even said I was cute! LOL! I still have the pic he sent me, and I'll never part with it. I'd be foolish to! It's bad enough I lost the letter he sent me in a flood. I don't want to lose this picture. The only reason I didn't is because I had that picture in a photo album that was put up high on a shelf that was not touched by the flood.

I never thought of Bob Hope as particularly handsome. Kinda cute, but not handsome. But most of all, I liked him because he made me laugh. He still makes me laugh, even though he's been dead now for several years. He died in 2003. After he died, I thought about getting the autographed pic he sent me framed. I still might. But I haven't yet. It's one of the things that's high on my "to-do" list. And yes, it is an original autograph! I can see the run-off marks left by the felt-tip pen he used. So, it's not a stamped autograph. When my ma first saw it, that's what she thought it was, but I knew better.

Well, there's the story of some of my past "loves". All of them are gone now, and today's celebrities aren't worth a damn. Shoot, they can't even make good movies anymore in Hollywood! That kinda sucks! Although I recently heard they were coming out with The Three Stooges movie. I'd really like to see that! Hopefully soon, maybe they can come out with a Marx Brothers movie!

Farewell Sweet Angus

Today I was at the dog park with my sis and our buddies. We were talking and joking around when Andy DiSanti came home with Lou. But Angus was missing. Karen went out to see Andy, I said if she brings him back here, I'm gonna stick my tongue out at him again. LOL! Little did I realize at that time what had happened. Then Anna heard Andy call us "a couple of fat fuckers". Anna shouted "Hey who are you calling a fat fucker!?" Andy shouted back "You! You fat fucking bitch!" So we both stuck our tongues out at him. LOL! Karen walked some of the way back to his apartment with him. Anna and I started giggling saying "That was cool!" LOL! He was PISSED!! Or so I thought that's what his problem was.

When Karen came back, she informed us that Angus had to be put to sleep. Angus was Andy's scottish terrier, and he was a good dog. I liked Angus. Anna started attacking Andy's character and Karen stopped her in her tracks saying "No! I don't want to hear rudeness right now so fuck off!" Poor Anna sat there and looked dumbstruck! LOL! Karen's our friend though, so I just take everything she says with a grain of salt. Besides, now that I knew what Andy's problem was, I actually felt bad for him. All I could remember was how I was when Groucho died. I snapped at EVERYONE!!! I was just as vicious as Andy was today. But Karen told him not to take his frustrations out on me and Anna, and she informed us that Andy apologized for saying that about us. After I found out that Angus died, I completely forgot about him shouting names at me and Anna. I totally excused it (for the first time ever), even though he would still talk shit like that about us even if he wasn't in mourning. But I excused it anyway, even if he hadn't apologized. All I could think of is how I was when Groucho died. I was just as bad. But I didn't need sassing and backtalk. A person in mourning needs kindness and understanding. I can tell you from personal experience that someone in mourning often says and does a lot of things they don't mean.

Well, I brought up the idea that what we should all do is give Andy a sympathy card and all of us sign it. Anna kept blantantly reminding me that we hate Andy. I said "I know that!" She thought I was deserting to the enemy. But this is in no way an apology for anything, nor even an offer to make peace with him. I'm doing this because I liked Angus and out of respect for him and Groucho. As much as I can't stand Andy, I loved Angus and I feel bad that Andy lost him. So I thought giving him a card was a very nice gesture. I do things like that because I love animals and pets, and I know what it's like to lose a pet. I remember back when I used to get into the INXS forums, there was this woman in there, named Penny, and we HATED each other! LOL! I had already said to her if she didn't like my posts then don't read them. After that, she didn't talk to me anymore at all. Well, one day she came in and mentioned that her favorite guinea pig had died. I felt bad for her losing her guinea pig, so I sent her a PM, sending her my condolences. I'm sure that kinda shocked her getting a PM from me like that, someone who she hated so much. But at that time, I didn't even think about that. I felt bad because she lost someone who she considered her best friend, her guinea pig. I actually cried when I heard she lost the guinea pig! I'm not even a big fan of guinea pigs. But animals are our friends, they give us unconditional love. That's something that few humans give.

What annoys me the most is when someone says "it's just a dog" or "it's just a cat" or "it's just a guinea pig!" and then say it isn't the same as losing a child or a person. BULL-FUCKING-SHIT!!!! It is EVERY bit as hurtful as losing a person or child! Maybe in some cases, even more so. Like I said, animals love us unconditionally. They never back-talk us, or judge us harshly. You can say and do the stupidest things in front of them, they don't care. They'll love you anyways. When I get home from a long day, nothing makes me happier than seeing my dogs greet me at the door with as much enthusiasm as if I had been gone for a year, ready to jump on my lap and lick my face. People don't give you that. Kids are only cute when they are real little, then when they reach a certain age they turn into fucking monsters! Who needs that? Probably one of the main reasons I never had kids. Karen's son is 32 years old and still gripes about her, telling her she was a bad mother.

When I got back from the dog park, immediately I took out a card and made it out to Andy. I had Kim, Anna and Karen all sign it. I asked Karen to deliver it to Andy. I could have done it myself, but I was afraid it would look very suspicious to him. And I didn't want him to feel suspicious. Not until after he read the card anyway. Then, he could do whatever he wanted with it. He could tear it up for all I care, but I wanted him to read it first. The message I wrote on it was genuine. I basically told him that I was so sorry to hear about Angus passing away, and he would be in my prayers and to remember that Angus is now in a better place, in GOD's hands. I am not even so sure Andy really believes in GOD, but I intend to say a prayer for him tonight. At least Angus is now out of pain, so we should be happy for him. He had a very long, full life. He was 16 years old! But he had so much trouble walking, and last summer, I noticed that he had a bulge on his side. I thought it could be cancer. And yes, that's what it was, he had a huge cancerous tumor in his belly. Karen told me that he had stopped eating completely. Personally, if Angus were my dog, I would have had him put down last summer. He was suffering then! Karen asked me "Would it be easy for you to put your dogs down?" I answered, "If I thought they were suffering like Angus clearly is, yes." As much as it hurt me to have Groucho put to sleep, seeing her suffer hurt me even more.

Well, I was proud of Anna, she signed the card for Andy, and didn't put up too much of a fuss. Again, this is not to make peace with him, I'm not trying to gain his friendship. I just loved Angus, and am doing this because of that. No "deserting to the enemy" is involved. He can still hate my guts for all I care! He can think we are the 2 fattest, ugliest bitches on the planet. I don't care. I just care about Angus now. RIP Angus.

Still Hated After All This Time

Wow! I was checking out some Jessi Slaughter videos, I'm still interested in knowing where she went wrong at! She is one of the most HATED people on the internet now. At least I found out one reason why. Because she dressed like a little whore and put her half-naked, 11-year old body on YouTube, and cussed like a sailor! But that's just one reason. I've seen kids almost that age dress just about as bad, and not get that badly bashed. But I think the big reason she was targeted the way she was is because she said Dahvie Vanity, who is the lead singer of a rock group called Blood on the Dance Floor, raped her. And her accusation almost ruined his career. So now I understand! HA! Kids can be so dumb! That's a horrible thing to do to someone you supposedly admire! Especially if you know how touchy people get about child rape! I love Tim Farriss, but I would NEVER EVER accuse him of raping a child!! Because I know he would never do it! If I was a kid, I wouldn't be saying someone I loved raped me when they actually didn't. Even if it was meant to be a joke, there are some places where you have to just draw the line. I wouldn't even say anything like that about someone I hated.

I remember some time ago, I hated Kirk Pengilly for snubbing me at a meet and greet. I still dislike him for that. I'm no longer a fan of his. But it wasn't the first time he did it, and there were witnesses, and I did not say that he raped me! I didn't even say it to ruin his career. I said it basically to get it off my chest, because well, it did hurt me deeply. I used to love that guy! He was right up there among my top favorite rock stars, next to Timmy. But when he snubbed me for like the 2nd time, I believe it was, it made me feel bad. I wouldn't have cared if a stranger snubbed me, or a rock star I didn't give 2 shits about, but I used to love Kirk. I admired him through pictures and videos, and to find out he wasn't that friendly to me, well, it bothered me. Timmy was nicer, in a gruffy kind of way. Not necessarily aloof, but a bit proud. But I would never intentionally ruin someone's career. I didn't even care if other INXS fans believed me about Kirk, or went along with me even. That was just my experience with him. If others like him, that's good! But I only have my own past experiences with him to draw on, and I have no choice but to go by that. Although I've considerably cooled off on that last incident, and I don't know. Hopefully soon, like this one fan said, we can possibly meet again, and maybe my experience with him then will be much more rewarding. Who knows? If he had just smiled at me, that would be nice. Because I stood there like a dumbass and smiled at him.

Well, what this girl did to Dahvie Vanity was horrible, but I can only hope she learned her lesson. And like all kids, she thinks she didn't do anything wrong. I just don't understand how a little girl who puts herself out there, can go from this:



To this:




First she says "You don't faze me", and then she says "you guys have ruined my life!" and she's crying about the hate comments she gets on her videos. I get ALL kinds of hate comments, and I mean ALL kinds! They don't faze me at all. In fact, I laugh at them. It's like "fuck them!" I almost felt bad when TwiztidAsh decided to drop me as a buddy, but that did not last long, believe me! LOL! Considering the kind of person TwiztidAsh really is. But anyway, I get all kinds of hate comments, I read each one (well, except maybe those of people I blocked from my account). But like I said, fuck them! They're just keyboard warriors looking for a little attention because they aren't getting it from anywhere else. Sometimes I even like feeding the trolls. It can be funny! But to date, absolutely NO hate comments have ever made me start crying. 100% of the people who leave comments like that on my channel are strangers anyway. So, I'm no worse off when they leave the comment than I was before they left the comment. That's how I see it. The only thing I don't take kindly to is threats. You can kick, scream, fuss, call me every name in the book, I don't care! But I don't take lightly to threats. I've never threatened anyone on the internet, so I expect the same respect from my viewers. I've never even so much as wished death on anyone. That's about the same as a threat to me.

This brings me to the third reason this girl was harassed, because she threatened her audience, and that is just something you never do. I hate trolls and haters myself, but heck, I say let them live their lives, and I'll live mine. They'll get what's coming to them soon enough. You know how Karma works! It always catches up with them! That's why people who kill others spend time in prison and death row even. I'm surprised that none of the people who have watched my "I Hate Montana" video have threatened to shoot me yet! They're probably thinking it though. LOL! But that would be kindof a stupid reason to kill someone, just because they don't like your home state, and if I survived, it'd only make my feelings about Montana worse. And if these people think they're "smarter" than I am (LOL!) nothing would tarnish their image like that would. A person doesn't look smart, or tough, if they harm an unarmed person. It only makes them look foolish because sooner or later, they will get caught.

Well, I still continue to put videos out there, I actually like getting comments. It gives me a reason to put up videos. I often upload a video to YouTube thinking "I wonder what kinds of comments I'll get on this video?" I think about both the good and bad comments. I think about what both my admirers and haters will say. I'm always prepared for any kind of comments, because not everyone is going to be positive when viewing one of my videos. I like to write about the stupidest trolls here on my blog because they're so dumb, they make me laugh sometimes. I am still waiting for that one most creative comment from someone who probably does not exist!

No Donations?

Hmm, that's interesting. I haven't seen a single donation from any of these idiot Montanans that say they want to "campaign to get all 'idiots' out of Montana". LOL! IMO, they probably should start with themselves, not with me. Though helping me get out of Montana would have been nice, instead of just saying they're campaigning to do something. Being all talk isn't going to get anyone anywhere. But I guess that's what people like CaptnHowD is, nothing but all talk and no action. I should have known. Anyone too scared to put up a video or even a picture of themselves on the internet has got to be nothing but all mouth and words. My guess too is he was one of those 'hit-and-run' trolls. And you all know what I say about hit-and-run trolls. They are the MOST cowardly of trolls! I was probably right about him being a fat-assed teenager who still sucks his mom's tits. Poor mom! LOL! Personally I can never understand someone being so cowardly. At no time in history has cowardice ever been rewarded or revered. Except by the wrong kind of people. I personally would hate to be caught calling someone else names or making fun of how they look, when I don't have any pics up of my own for that person to judge me by. That would make me feel like a slug! A spineless slug! I'd hate that feeling! I just never say shit about how someone else looks, because I know I am no great-looker myself. Some people still say I look beautiful, even some guys, and I could be pretty if I wanted to be, perhaps with some make-up and fix my hair a bit better. But frankly, I don't have the time, or much desire, to do any of that, so this is just how I look.

I remember when I was a teenager, my ma didn't want me to wear make-up. She said GOD made everyone beautiful in HIS eyes. We don't need make-up to make us look better. GOD's opinion is really the only one that counts in the end. Although I must say, I did feel a little bit left out when all the other girls in my class were wearing make-up and fixing up their hair, and I never did any of that. I guess the habit just never stuck with me to put on make-up and stuff. So, that's why I live with being ugly (in other peoples' eyes). But as I have mentioned on this blog before, there is actually an advantage to being ugly and fat. A fat person is harder to kidnap, and who'd want to rape an ugly person? LOL! I've learned to look at the gloomy side in a positive way. I mean really! What's the worst someone can do to me? Call me names from inside their moving vehicle? LOL! Again, those people are like those hit-and-run trolls. They're cowards. I laugh at cowards. I remember once that happened and I was walking with a friend, someone shouted a name at me from inside their car as they drove by. I forgot what that person even said, because just then my friend that I was walking with said to me "Just pretend like you NEVER heard him!" LOL! That may not sound funny, but it was the way she said it that made me laugh so hard that what that drive-by guy shouted at me just completely slipped out of my mind. Like I said, I don't even remember what he said! LOL! About 3 minutes after he shouted it, I didn't remember what he said! I often wonder what happened to this friend. I haven't seen her since 1996.

Well, she was just one of my many "idiot" friends (as CaptnHowD puts it, LOL!) that I loved so much. LOL! She was a decent person, as all my "idiot" friends are. hehehe! :) I mean, I may not be outstandingly popular, and frankly, I don't want to be. I've seen what becoming that popular does to a person. It always goes to their head! Even the nicest person becomes snobby, stupid and impossible to live with. Having enemies at least helps keep a person in their place. I actually feel better having a lot of enemies than having a lot of friends. Really! If a person doesn't have enemies, then that means they're doing something wrong. They're not, in any way, standing up for what they believe in. I've always been very big in that department. If there's one thing a person can never truly say I am, it's an ass-kisser. Well! They can say it! LOL! That's called freedom of speech! But to actually be able to apply it to me personally, they can't do it! What I write in these blogs, and say in my videos, is definitely contrary proof. Sometimes it's people with the least number of friends that turn out to be the greatest people you could ever meet. That usually means all the "fair-weather" friends have been weeded out, and who wants those kinds of friends anyway! I remember Metalraptor told me he didn't have many friends, which I actually found hard to believe, because he's so nice and so smart! But again, a lot of times, other people don't see that. Especially if a person is shy. I have few friends here in Montana, most of them I left behind in Washington state. But even there, I can't say I had hundreds of friends. But the ones I did have were decent, honest people who kept me happy and smiling. That's all I need. I almost feel like I abandoned them when I moved here.

Anyway, if any Montanans still want to "campaign" to get me out of Montana, click the donation link below! I can use the help!

I Hate Montana!

My I Hate Montana video sure did get a lot of attention! But I don't mind. Even though it is a reminder of how psychotic Montanans get when you tell them you don't like their state. I swear, they act like you are dissing their family! It's just a damn state! Get over yourselves! I never remember Washingtonians being like this about Washington state! Or Oregonians being like this about Oregon state, or even Idahoans being like that about Idaho State! Not even Californians are like that! Only Montanans seem to shit their pants when you talk like that about Montana. It's not like I haven't heard them talk shit about this state themselves. I guess with Montanans it's like "do as I say, not as I do". Well guess what, I do as I say, not what other people want me to say. Not gonna happen. I still don't like Montana. They won't change that! So I put them up a link in case they choose to donate to get me out of Montana faster. If I have to save the money all by myself, it's going to take a LOT longer for me to get out of here. Donate today (or any day) and I can get out faster. If there was one person I figured would donate, it's this fool who calls himself "CaptnHowD", and told me he's campaigning to clear all the "idiots" out of Montana. Of course in his eyes, "idiot" just means someone who doesn't like Montana. In my eyes, an "idiot" is someone like him, who thinks he owns this state and can control what other people think of this state by acting like an idiot. Well, this is me. I gave him a shout-out anyway. I enjoy getting comments. It means I've made some people think, which is what the World needs now. They need to be shocked now and then. Check this out!



I say, don't "campaign" anything unless you intend to follow completely through with it. I believe this is a free country, a person can stay where they want to. The only reason I am here is to support my sister. But in our visit to Idaho Falls (which is better in climate than Montana) I really discovered how much I miss the coast. It was the first weekend since I moved that my hands were not dry. I'm not really dissing the people, well except the ones I live with and the psycho-twats like CaptnHowD. He seems to think he's smarter than me, but he's not. I can tell him now. In the video above, I quoted a comment he made about me going out to get lotion. CaptnHowD was either too dumb to understand when I said that in my first video, or it flew right over his head and he missed it. I just gave him a big "DUH!" LOL! So again, here's my donation link, if this 'person' (and I use the term loosely) still wants to "campaign to get all idiots out of Montana" (hahaha!) I say shut the fuck up and start doing something about it, big chief! If you don't, you're living proof that talk is definitely cheap! :)

Nevermind My Last Post!

The feeling is completely gone. hehehe! Actually, my "sadness" over losing TwiztidAsh as a buddy didn't last long at all. Only a couple of hours. I thought I would have to at least take several months to get over losing her as a bud, but no. I was over it almost instantly. For 2 reasons: 1) Because my primary focus now that spring is here is in getting myself back to the coast. Looking for an apartment there now has become my daily chore, and I find I have no time to think about anything else. And 2) When you consider TwiztidAsh's history, she was very easy to forget about. I heard about the World of Warcraft incident, and I used to think nothing of it. But that was why she made this one video that became viral of her getting all ninja and everything, calling everyone else a bunch of 'pussies' and threatening to bash their heads in. LOL. She allowed those people to bully her off her account. I never let people bully me off of anywhere! I never have and I never will. I may quit someplace because I don't have time to go there anymore, or some other reason, but I never allow bullies to push me off of somewhere I enjoy. And believe me, people have tried! LOL!

I remember a long time ago, on the Pluba forums (back when they were a forum) Mcgillicutty tried very hard to bully me off those forums. Even going so far as to create a whole new troll identity (MyFaveMartian) just to post up a link to my old MySpace where I was discussing the people of that forum a lot. She was probably hoping I was going to turn away in shame and never come back, but I didn't. I stayed there and communicated with my buddies. When Mcgillicutty found out that her tactic was not going to work with me, she started harassing, and getting meaner and meaner with me, still in hopes she could bully me into leaving. Still no. It did not work with me. I wasn't nearly about to give her the satisfaction. I stuck around. If for nothing else now, to piss her off more! hehehe! I hope she got ulcers from being that pissed off every day! hehehe! I figured out she was not a 50-something year old man, but a teenage girl. It was Sara Weiler (in my book, Serena Weiner), who was pissed off because I didn't like her intentionally breeding BYB quality chihuahuas, and I told her so. I knew there was only so many people mcgillicutty could have been. I didn't give my personal info to many people, and I could never imagine any of my friends doing what she did. So, I knew it had to be this teenage girl. I sure as hell was not going to let a teenager run me off anywhere. So, I stuck around. There is a lot to be said about your real friends standing by you, no matter what. So, that's why I stayed.

I only decided to leave when most of my friends left, and I started to discover what jerks show breeders are. With my friends there, for some reason, that was harder to see. But when they left, I started to see that much more clearly. Especially when DJ's Doxies fell under their spell. She was someone I considered a friend, very much so. But then she went to a dog show one weekend, and said she came back with a different attitude toward show breeders, and began saying how stupid people must be that thought show breeders were "a certain way" (not her exact words). Well, I could not help how I felt about show breeders, since most of the ones I met were that "certain way". Some were nice and kind, I really liked her closest friend on the forum, Hornybull. I still think she was cool. But not all show breeders are like her. In fact, she was in a class by herself. She was the rarer variety of show breeder. If show breeders were to be judged by their personality, as well as the quality of their dogs, she would have been the champion of the world.

Well, that's why TwiztidAsh was so easy to "get over". Just consider her history, she gives up on things (and people) too easily. In other words, she's weak-spirited. My guess is she can never be a real friend to anyone. EVER. Especially those who do not agree with her 100%. So, I don't feel the least bit bad about losing her as a buddy anymore. In fact, in thinking about this, if she were to try and befriend me again, I can tell her now, it would not work. I don't like weak-spirited people. I prefer much stronger people as friends. I think she's the f***ing pussy. No one else.

Lost One Subscriber

Well, I lost TwiztedAsh as a buddy this morning. She hated my panther fanatics video and pulled anchor and left. Well, as sorry as I am to hear that's how she feels now, like I said to her when a person has had enough, they've had enough. That is what panther fanatics have pushed me to do, and I still hold that ultimatum that if they keep on harassing me, I will put up more videos like that one. Of course I am always sad to lose a friend, but I'll get over it soon enough. She said to me "I guess you're not the person I thought you were." Well she may be right. I'm an extremely complex person. Too complex for the average mind to comprehend. That's why so many "average" people think I don't make any sense. I can be very, VERY evil, or I can be an absolute, lovely angel. But I think this last panther fanatic (the one from Romania) took the cake when he said that Tim Farriss is retarded. I am not trying to act like a fanatic, but the fact that he said Timmy was a retarded dog just because I hate panthers, I wanted to give him and other panther fanatics something in return for that. That and the fact that I believe he is connected with NewZealandKiwi, who has been trying to get my attention for some time now, and trying to force me to believe his way about dogs and panthers.

Frankly I am not that sad to lose a subscriber. I've been reconsidering holding on to this account at YouTube again. In trying to upload these videos, I've found that my uploader now does not work right, and it annoys the piss out of me! Really! When I tried to upload that last video, it liked to have never finished processing. It was hours before it finally did. I had to get into Google Chrome in order to get it to work! I can't keep doing that. Seems every time I get on YouTube, I find there is something I hate about this new set-up. I'll never really understand these new channel set-ups. YouTube has made changes before, but never to this extent! And I just don't like it anymore. I've been seriously considering pulling anchor myself and just saying goodbye to YouTube. I might keep my FattyTV channel though. Although I hardly ever sign on to it. But the uploader there is much better. For some reason, the one I got stuck with (probably because it's monetized) doesn't work right. That sucks! I might just post all my videos on here instead of YouTube. That's not such a bad idea!

*************************UPDATE*****************************

I just got this message from TwiztedAsh:

They have a right to "harass" you when you show dead animals. That is against the TOS. And you are going to get "harassed" by animal lovers! I don't find it funny at all and honestly feel like punching you in the face to defend the honor of my "panther" who just passed away. Yes we're talking about a housecat but she was huge and I called her my panther. And I take the honor of my cats VERY seriously!

I love animals too. But even I have my limits. I bet anything if that had been a video showing an animal she hates dead she would not have cared. But I hate panthers. So seeing them dead does not bother me. And she said she feels like punching me in the face? Ohhh I'm soooo scared! LOL! If she tried, I'd definitely do the same back to her. Well anyway, this was my response to her:

"No, the harassment came before the video. That was why I put up the video. Got it now? Sorry about your cat, but I still hate panthers."

Like I said, NOTHING they can say will change my mind about that. More likely she will come back with a big "F-you!" but who cares? I've lost buddies before because I hate panthers. If they let that stand in their way, then I guess they aren't worth my time.

Something Interesting

I was kinda thumbing through YouTube yesterday, and I noticed something I ran across that was very interesting. I found out what Hobofart's problem is. I found out why he hates juggalos so much! He used to be a juggalo himself (big surprise huh?) but he decided he did not like Insane Clown Posse anymore when he discovered that they were not gay. HA! That's kinda funny. Then he was never a true fan of the band. He was just hoping at least one of the bandmembers was gay so he could get some cock from them or something. LOL! I remember a year or so ago, one of my friends said he was being this way because someone gave him coal for Christmas and he was angry at the world because of it. But I knew, from my own experiences with people, that there had to be FAR more to his behavior than that! The reason I know it must be true that he hates juggalos because the men of ICP are not gay, is because I've seen a lot of Hobofart's friends, and they are all gay people. Hobofart must be gay himself as well. Either that, or he has an unnaturally big fetish for gays.

Me? I'm an INXS fan. I love the men of INXS and I love their music. I even adore the fans. I don't care for the fanatics, but I love the fans. Like the juggalos, I think of most of them as family. Not family in the traditional sense, but the fact that we do have a common bond, and that is the men of INXS and our adoration of their music. INXS fanatics are a breed totally apart. They are basically the people who think they own the band. Like they can control what the band does, and how other fans should think. Like this one person who came onto one of my INXS talk videos and said that if I really loved INXS, basically I would not be saying I didn't like that new version of Kick. I showed her up but good! I think that makes me a better fan than any of them. Because I am honest about what I like about them and what I don't like. And I personally think INXS are mature enough to accept that is how I feel. Of course I am just one fan. I cannot change how the band is alone.

Did you know that the word "fan" is basically a shortened version of the word "fanatic"? LOL! I've always known that. But I feel there is a big difference between a fan and a fanatic. For some reason, I don't see the two words meaning the same thing. I like to think of myself as an INXS fan. That is, I love INXS, but I don't care if anyone else agrees with me that they are the best band in the world. Loving INXS the way I do is my choice. No one else's. But I don't think of myself as a fanatic. That is, I don't get all bent out of shape when someone else disses INXS and says they don't like them. And believe me, so many people have tried to piss me off with that. I never even feel anger. Because I know that is just their opinion. That is how they feel, not me. As long as they don't try to force me to see INXS the way they do, I don't care what their initial feelings of the band are. I respect those peoples' decision and I just don't discuss INXS with them. And I usually tell them not to listen when I discuss the band. hehe! In no way do I ever force them to see INXS the way I do, and as long as they are as respectful with me as I am with them, I don't harbor any hard feelings against them for not liking INXS. THAT is what makes me a fan, but not a fanatic. I may ask someone why they don't like INXS, but that's as far as it goes for me. I don't tell them they are insane for not liking INXS, or they must be stupid or anything. I don't feel that way. Because that is their right of choice.

I remember once this happened on the Craigslist pet forum. One of the members there was a big fan of some professional chef from Australia, I forget his name now, but I do know he has his own cooking show. This person said he was the most handsome man she's ever seen. I saw his pic, and personally I thought he was ugly! His eyes were beady and too close together. He kinda looked like Jon Stevens with short, curly, blond hair. Of course I didn't tell her that! I just said he's not my type, and that Tim Farriss is the celeb I love the most. Well, she didn't go for how Timmy looked either. I just told her that's OK. I wasn't even angry at all. When I was younger, and a lot less mature, I might have gotten pissed. But now, no. Now, I just look at it as she has her opinion, and I have mine. Simple as that.

Well, in other news, Anna and I have been discussing my return to the coast. I'm going to move back there, and stay in a temporary dwelling until I can find a more permanent home. Perhaps stay in subsidized housing for a while until I can find a better place. I'd prefer a rental home. But staying in a temporary place will give me a chance to look for one and have a good place to come back to, rather than visiting down there for like a week, and then coming back here with nothing having been accomplished. Most of the people who put ads up, either in the newspaper or on Craigslist, usually do not answer right away. So to say "I'm going there to stay for a week to find a place to move to" I would not be accomplishing much. Who knows if I will even find anything in a week's time? It could take several weeks, or even months, to find a place. And to have to return here to Bozeman after not finding anything within a week's time, it would not help me re-establish myself back on the coast at all. One of the tenants here is selling a car and I am serious about buying it from her. Once I do, I am halfway to my goal. The next step will be to save some money for the actual move and deposits. Then, I can totally establish myself on the coast again, and I'll be home free!

They Pushed Me Into Doing It!!

I just made a video and put it up on Youtube. It's been a while since I've made a video, but the panther-fanatics have given me a new idea! It's kinda twisted, I know that, but they pushed me into doing the video! And I said that from now on, for every panther-fanatic that harasses or threatens me or my dogs, I will put up another video like this one.

LOL! All it is basically is pics of dead panthers with laughing in the background, I also included a little message at the end for this group of panther fanatics. I closed the comments on this video only because I want the panther-fanatics to suffer! I only hope my panther-loving friends don't take this personally. I didn't mean it for them. Only for the panther fanatics that have been harassing me because I love dogs and hate panthers. Seriously, fanatics ruin everything for everybody!

Already I got one whining panther-fanatic! LOL! He says

Just saw your other video about dead panthers...You are a sick twisted fuck for thinking that's funny. I'm talking about panther CHAMELEONS to by the way why would anyone be talking about actual panthers on a video about reptiles? Grow up

HAHAHAHA!! Then I know I am doing something right! I hope it disturbs other panther fanatics the way it bothered this dude. Incidentally this was the same guy who asked me yesterday what I meant by panther lovers being spineless.

******************UPDATE***************************
The panther-fanatics video has been flagged by the whiny panther-fanatics and taken off of YouTube. I say Fine! But I am going to turn in names of the panther-fanatics that have harassed and threatened me and my dogs. I'm going to have them reported as well, and post the video here. :)