This was the subject on Dr. Phil tonight and I thought I would put my 2 cents worth in this discussion. He talked to 2 youngsters whose reputations had been ruined by slanderous people. Or people who got their facts wrong or mixed up. I can tell you that has happened to me many times. I'm certainly not going through life unscathed! LOL! I've been called all kinds of things. I mean, people look at my blogs and how I conduct myself on the internet, and they automatically come to the conclusion that I'm a lunatic. Well, they're not totally wrong!! Yes, I come by it honestly. I don't try to hide the fact that a lot of things I do could be seen as lunacy by some. And in many ways I'm happy that I am not what others perceive as "normal". Hell, I don't want to be "normal"!!!! But the one thing I've found, everybody has their own idea of what is normal in a person and what is not. Now, forgive me for digging up old bones but a perfect example of what different people believe is "normal" behavior puts me in mind of the delusional fans forum and all of it's members.
Catsredrum has some kind of idea that she is a "normal" individual. And I, never actually having met her or spoken to her, did not know what she was really like in person, but the conduct she displayed on the internet was nowhere near what I would have called "normal" behavior. But I'm no expert, so I turned the attention of the delusional fans forum over to some buddies of mine who were experts in psychology (the study of human behavior, including mental states). And they totally agreed with me. Catsredrum and her friends had a very unhealthy obsession with me. Now, I don't know what Catsredrum is like in person, though I did see where she wrote on her forum that she even discusses me to her friends OUTSIDE of her forum. But IMO, as well as the friends I discussed this with, yes they were indeed unhealthily obsessed with me. And most of the things they said about me were untrue. All my friends knew it, including the ones who had studied psychology. Who knows what brought on Catsredrum's obsession. I truly believe, to this day, that it was triggered solely by the fact that I didn't like DonnaG anymore. Because her obsession with me did not even begin until I announced to the World that she and I were not friends anymore. And Donna is infamous for getting all her friends (and anyone who will believe her) to turn on people who don't like her. That is precisely why I don't like her anymore! She would have earned more respect from me if she had confronted me herself and kept her cronies OUT of the debate. But enough of digging up old bones.
I say personally people are always going to think whatever they want to no matter what! But one thing that I always remember is that actions speak louder than words. You can look through my background, I've never been convicted of any crimes, I've never hurt anyone, I'm still a virgin (even though I've been married), I don't drink, smoke or do drugs, I've never posted anyone else's pictures or information on the internet without their permission, and I am working on my attitude!! The worst thing you'll find on my record is driving with expired tabs. And even those can be explained. :P I've had a few dead-end jobs, but I've had some good ones too. And for the most part, the supervisors all adored me! In cases when I've quit jobs, they begged me not to. But to be honest, there were a couple of jobs where I left on a sour note, like the one at the Puyallup Fair. But that job was just one of those dead-end jobs that I didn't want in the first place, run by a stupid company, owned by a stupid family, and the acting supervisor just got a kick out of treating all the workers like crap. Whether they were good workers or not.
I admit I've still got a long way to go as far as my own attitude goes, but I'm still working on it. I'm not quite down where I want to be. Anyway, I am where I figured I'd be. Here it is almost the end of the year, and my attacks on people have lessened. They haven't disappeared, but they've lessened. I have refrained from attacking my usual subjects though. I still have fun with the people on YouTube though. But I figure it's harmless fun! I'm just yanking their chains. That's why I always end with this symbol [:P]. But anyway, we all face people who are going to do anything to ruin our reputations. But people who are truly good, aren't going to care what someone else says about someone. Ya know that's why I am soooooo glad I met Metalraptor. He's taught me a lot. He's taught me that I need to work on my temper issues, he told me that I tend to get all irrational. It's actually been through him that I'm learning to control myself. I'm actually proud of how I've handled myself on YouTube, it's good practice. I didn't lose my temper or get all irrational, and I haven't called anyone names or gotten personal with anyone. I've put that on their shoulders! I have found though through most of my experiences with people on YouTube that if you treat them with respect and be nice to them, even though they are getting all irrational, it makes their attitudes get worse!! I think they mistake kindness as being a sign of weakness or tolerance. But no. For me, it's all part of a master plan. I'm training myself to be a much better person. I only post it on here so my readers can see my progress. I think I've had enough fun with cat-people though. So now I'm moving on to videos that will help me in my future project. I've been trying to learn all I can about frogs, snakes and lizards.
Anyway, I have been slandered a lot in the past, mostly on the internet. The only time I've ever been slandered more was when I was in middle school. But I figure those people who slander me, they know nothing about me! They've never met me, never spoke with me, many of them are only muppets who repeat what they've been told by other people who do not know me either. So, they're only embarrassing themselves. I also believe everything happens for a reason and that we all get what we deserve in the long run. I'm already heading upward. When I do get to the point I'm working so hard to be at, I'm going to look back down at those who tried to bring me down at some point and I'm going to be able to stick my tongue out at them and say "Look at me! I'm here, and you're not! So how do you like that!" But at the same time, I'm going to caress those who supported me. Because it's them who helped me move foreward to where I want to be at. So that is why I pay no attention to those who talk shit about me, and focus solely on the people who have always supported me and kept my head up when things looked down. Two of the biggest conveyers in this has been Katrina and Metalraptor. I owe both of them BIG!!!! And I hope to reward them someday, somehow. The people who shit-talk me, I've been staying away from them. I still don't go into forums at all. Except for a couple of Facebook groups, and of course YouTube. I know there are always going to be people who talk behind my back. Shoot! That's why I quit going to dog shows and why I hate show breeders so much!! Believe me, that's not a random prejudice!!! I've gotten to know several show breeders before! I wouldn't hate them so much if I didn't know what they were really like.
Again, I know not all show breeders are bad. I've met a handful that were very good people. Just like any other race, there are good ones and there are bad ones. But the good ones unfortunately can only be counted on the fingers of one hand!! The main things that make me so prejudice against show breeders are:
1. They demand respect but give none in return.
2. They think they're GOD, which I believe is why most of them laugh at people who do believe in the real GOD.
3. They judge people they don't even know.
4. They shit-talk people they don't know behind their backs instead of to that person's face. Then they shit their pants when the same thing is done to them.
5. They never let the past STAY in the past, where it should.
6. Many of them are mean-spirited and don't believe in treating others with kindness.
Basically all the same things. The only thing good about show breeders is that they breed to improve the breed they're working with. That's IT. The bad far outweighs the good. The show breeders I like are the ones who truly believe in helping people, who treat other people with kindness and respect, who do not listen to vile rumors going around about someone but instead sit and talk with, and get to know, that person for themselves and build their own opinion of that person. Another trait I would admire in show breeders (if more of them had it) is those who know that whatever they do--good or bad--reflects on the breed and the goal most show breeders are striving for: preservation of the breed!! That's why I always treated everyone with respect when I was trying to better my breeding program. I didn't want to become like some breeders I met who think they could get their word across by being hateful and snippy at others. Though having been in the position to try and educate people who did wrong by the breed, I can sometimes see why show breeders are the way they are. But someone like me, who had attended several dog shows in my day, that should have told the show breeders who doubted me that I was indeed serious about breeding the right way. The people I dealt with bred Taco Bell lookalikes and wanted to keep doing so. They'd never been to a show and some of them even laughed at the idea of breeding dogs the right way, and called the concept of informing those who bred bad specimens "cruel".
Well, I didn't go to many shows, but I went to as many as I could. I'm a busy person, and most of my time I like to devote to my dogs as PETS. Not as things to be pruned and pranced around a cement ring just so one person can give his or her own opinion about which one of which is better than the other. Thus giving the owner and breeder of that animal a head so swelled that they go around and stomp to death on people who look up to them as heros of said breed! IMO, they are no more heros than a mother who drags her daughter from one beauty pageant to another, whether or not the daughter is a willing participant. One thing I've found, show breeders will not even talk to you unless you've been endorsed by another show breeder. And good luck in getting that endorsement!!! Because most of the show breeders that others respect are like the ones I described on my list of things I hate about them!! If having someone who will act like your friend to your face and then turn around and slam you behind your back doesn't bother you, then find a show breeder to be your friend! I've learned to meet all show breeders as if they are enemies!! It's a lot better than thinking they're your friend and later finding out different. Been there, done that, didn't like it, and won't let it happen again!!! It wasn't so bad when it was just one show breeder, I figured, "She's just one bad apple in the bunch." But then I started seeing that kind of behavior in many different show breeders, some may or may not have known this one I don't know, I don't care!! It was then I knew that show breeders are not as good as they like to portray themselves to be.
Many people are going to believe what they want and won't let you tell them any different. I've come to a point where I just say the Hell with them! I let my actions do the talking. If, after I have proven them wrong, they continue to believe what they want about me then I figure they are the ones with the problem, NOT me!! It's just not worth my time or effort to convince them that their ideas about me are wrong. So I just let them think what they want to.......and then laugh in their stupid faces when I do something to prove their ideas about me are wrong. LOL! The only people whose opinions matter anyway are the people I consider my friends, and my family. No one else's opinions matter to me. If I never considered someone a friend, then what they think of me means nothing, as I am no worse off with them than I was before. I've grown up a little more over the past few years in understanding what makes a friend a friend. And it has improved my life 200%!!! When it comes to friends, I prefer quality over quantity. I may not have many friends, but the people I do consider friends are people I know I can trust all the way! They're people that are very trustworthy, as anyone goes. They don't talk about me behind my back, they don't give away my secrets, they would never do anything to hurt me or anyone else, I know all this because their friends are my friends. Or at least acquaintences! If any of them did talk about me behind my back, believe me I'd KNOW it!!! hehe! I get criticism from them all the time, sometimes harsh criticism too. But it's all for the better and I know it. I've seen some people who say "So-n-so has sooooo many friends!" But I say look at the kind of people "so-n-so" considers friends! I know of someone like that, has a lot of friends, but I look at the kind of people that person calls friends. If they are people I wouldn't want as friends, then the fact that "so-n-so" has a lot of friends really doesn't mean shit to me! That's why I favor quality over quantity. I even have one friend that once said Catsredrum sometimes seemed like a nice person. Though she added that she would never make friends with someone who's been cruel to me. But that goes to show the kind of people I call friends. This person has a very good heart, and she gets to know people herself before making judgments about them, and I like that in my friends. I have no respect at all for someone who believes what others say about someone else and not get to know that person for themselves--which is the main reason why I hate show breeders and have lost all respect for them!!!
I'll tell you, I'd probably have a lot more friends if there were only more people like this person. But unfortunately, in this World and age of the internet, people like that are RARE!!! And I don't mean "maybe"!! In this day and age, I've noticed people are much more aggressive, hateful, and disrespectful with others than I ever remember them being!! I'm a small-town girl, I was brought up to treat people with kindness and you will get kindness back from them. That hasn't been proven to be true with the internet. Like I said earlier, I think people now mistake kindness as being a form of weakness. But let me tell you, it's NOT!!